Page 36 of Footlights and Forever

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It was much later on that I found myself in that same kitchen, four beers in with a nice buzz going on.

“You’re Austin, right?” a girl from my theatre class slurred as her sweaty hands pawed at my arm.

“Yep,” I sighed. “Clara, right?”

“That’s so sweet that you remember my name.” I nodded as I looked at the name badge on the college ID she still had around her neck. There were a few types of people in the world whom I found to be just unbearable. People who went on hikes and felt the need to tell you about the freedom and energy they had from completing a long hike. I just had sticky balls and a bad mood after a hike. I also didn’t like people who say Coke wasbetter than Pepsi, when the truth was blatant to see: Pepsi was superior; and finally, people who wore college lanyards as part of their personality in the hopes that someone on the subway might ask, “So you go to NYU?”. I had the feeling Clara was part of that crowd.

“My friend is completely in love with you.” My ears perk uped; always nice to have an admirer. “I keep telling him that it’s no use and that you have a boyfriend, but he can’t seem to shut up about how sweet and thoughtful you are.”

“That’s really nice of him.” I smiled; a shameless praise whore, I preened a little.

“Yeah, he says how sexy he thinks you are and how he has dreamed of just kissing you for hours.” She looked around as if she expected someone to pull her away from me.

“I think maybe you should find your friends Clara,” I chuckled, “I don’t think they would be too happy if they knew you were out here spilling all their secrets.”

“Oh, pshaa!” she laughed. “He wouldn’t care, it’s blatantly obvious the way he is always staring at you. Where is he anyways? This is his house. It’s rude for him to disappear on me.”

“Clara!” I turned to see Kevin pushing his way through the crowd towards us. “There you are.” His hand came to rest on her shoulder.

“Hey buddy!” she squealed, wrapping her arms around his waist. “I was just telling Austin here about how you say that he…”

His hand immediately came up to cover her mouth which made her squirm against him. “I think Clara here has had too much to drink,” he laughed nervously, “I think she needs to go lie down.”

“I’ll take her,” one of the frat boys smiled, wrapping his arms around Clara’s. It was clear they were also friends, as she whinedinto his neck about how wine shouldn’t make her want to throw up so much when she loved grapes.

“Sorry about that.” Kevin winced as he watched Clara move upstairs with his buddy. “Hope she wasn’t too much of a bother.”

I felt a hand slap on my shoulder, and turned around to see Kyle moving past me towards the living room. He gave me a quick wink before disappearing around the corner. “Your brother’s weird.”

“True story.” He shrugged.

“So what Clara was telling me…” I started, but someone shoves me from behind as people reached for liquor bottles on the cabinet, and then there was another shove as someone reached for a glass from the cabinet behind me. “Hey, it’s a little crowded in here. Wanna go somewhere quieter where we can actually talk without being assaulted?”

He nodded. My stomach did this weird thing where butterflies fluttered in the giant pit of guilt lodged in my stomach.What do you have to feel guilty for? You haven’t done anything wrong. You’re just going to talk to the guy.

Kevin grabbed me by the wrist and led me through the kitchen to the back door and out onto the terrace. “If we walk down the garden a bit there’s a swing there. It’s cushioned, unlike these torture devices,” he laughed, pointing as some ornately carved seats around a table on the deck.

“Sure.” We walked down a small set of stone steps into the garden. About thirty feet down the garden was said swing. The seat was much smaller than I’d imagined. We slumped into the seat next to each other, our sides pressed together all the way down to our knees.

“So…” Kevin began.

I looked into his eyes, the swirling blue set against his tan skin. The perfect complexion and flawless hair swept into the perfect style. I smelled a citrusy scent on him and felt his warmthall around me. It was nice, pleasant. It was welcoming and sultry, and in that very moment, I felt something wasn’t right. I shouldn’t have been there. I should have been with Dylan. I craved to have his crazy shaggy chestnut hair between my fingers. I wanted to see his shy smile as I tilted his mouth up to mine. I wanted his scent that screams home.

Kevin was gorgeous and everything that I should want.

What I wanted was Dylan.

“Listen, I heard what Clara said about how you feel, and I am really flattered that you feel that way about me.” I started, resting my hand on top of his.

“Really?” His eyes were hopeful.

Abort!“Yes, I think you’re really awesome and you have been such a good friend, and of course I would be lucky to have someone like you feel that way about me…”

I didn’t get anything else out. With the reflexes of a jungle cat he reached up and snagged the back of my neck, pulling me quickly to him. His lips crashed into mine as his tongue plundered my mouth. I was stunned for a moment and didn’t know what to do. I reached up both hands and fisted the material of his shirt, ready to push him back, when it happened.

“Austin?” A small, weak, devastated voice said.

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