Page 86 of Embracing Trust

Ryan comes after me, as he shouts my name. He says other things—maybe explanations, but I don’t hear.

I have to get to my car. I have to get out of here.

Thank goodness no one is parked behind me. I manage to get into the car and lock the doors just in time. Ryan pounds on my car window a second later.

“Julia! Open the door! We need to talk.” Ryan’s face is red, and his eyes are like saucers as he tries to open the locked car door.

I put the car in reverse and hit the gas as I leave Ryan on the driveway. I catch a glimpse of the front porch where Kate stands. Her mouth is open, and she folds her hands against her chest. Aubree smiles and gives a quick small wave.

My hands shake and they’re slick from the sweat. I can barely grip the steering wheel. My heart pounds and my blood pulsates through every vein with a vengeance. I can’t take any deep breaths and I pant between sobs.

My thoughts bounce uncontrollably as I try to piece together the events of the past few months.

Everyone knew. His family and probably our friends. Brad and Mark knew and maybe they thought it was funny. I’m such a fool. I guess this explains what he’s been hiding. It’s like my father doing this to me all over again—keeping secrets, seeing other women behind my mother’s back. It’s like being exposed—standing in front of a crowd and they’re laughing at me.

I can’t believe he invited me to see his pregnant fiancé—and rub it all in my face. Who does that? A monster, that’s who. He’s been different since he’s been back from the Army, but I never dreamed he could do something so calculated—so mean—just to hurt me.

My vision is blurry from the tears. I swipe at my eyes.

I just need to get home where I’m safe.

At last, I pull the car onto my driveway, and I run to my front door.

I have to get inside. I have to be alone.

I fumble with the keys as my hands shake. My unsteady breath comes out in puffs between my loud sobs.

I finally manage to unlock the front door, shove it open, and rush inside. I slam the door closed behind me and turn the deadbolt. My purse and keys fall to the tile with a loud thud, and I lean my back against the door for support. My legs are shaky and weak. My body glides down the door and my butt lands on the cool tile.

I take a few deep breaths and try to get my sobs under control. The house is quiet, and I close my eyes as I focus on the cool tile against my hot skin.

My head perks up when I hear brakes screech on my driveway and a vehicle’s door slams. I freeze and jam my hands into my armpits as I hug myself.

Footsteps sound on the porch and three loud knocks sound on my front door.

“Julia!”

Why would he follow me?

“Julia! Please, I need to talk to you.”

I take a deep breath and pull a strong voice buried in my chest. “Go home, Ryan!”

“Baby, open the door.” He practically begs.

“Don’t call me that!”

He pounds on the door again.

I stand from the floor and crack the door—just enough so I don’t have to shout. I don’t have the energy.

Ryan’s eyes are red and bloodshot. “I just need you to listen to me.” His voice is rough, almost gravelly.

I shake my head and a momentary gift of strength comes over me. “No, Ryan.” My voice is shaky, but I force out the words. “Youjust need to listen tome. Go home. Go back to your pregnant fiancé and stay away from me.”

I slam the door shut, turn the deadbolt, and make my way to the couch. I plop down and listen as he continues to knock.

“I know you can hear me.”

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