Page 101 of Embracing Trust

I shake my head. “Just tell me what to do.”

Julia sighs. “It’s not a specific thing that I can tell you to do. It’s more like…share your life with me. Trust me enough to share yourself—your good and your bad. Tell me your passions and your fears. Open your heart to me. And expect the same from me—that I’ll share those things with you.” Julia slumps down on the swing. “Right now, I feel like you’re doing the same thing to me my father did—sneaking around.”

Her words are a knife to my chest. Being compared to her father—the man who cheated on his wife, broke apart his family and, crushed his little girl’s heart. Her father was no man. He was deceptive, weak, and unreliable. He only thought of himself and didn’t protect his family. He didn’t keep them safe.

I rub the back of my neck. “I hope you’re not comparing me to your father.” The words are bitter on my tongue.

I wait for Julia’s response. My heart continues its raging assault in my chest.

“I’m not necessarily comparing, but my heart goes back there. That was a very dark time for me, and I don’t ever want to go through something like that again.”

The silence lingers between us like a fog.

Her eyes meet mine and there’s a tiny spark of recognition of what we once had. “You’ve dropped a ton on me here and I need some time. I just need some time to work through it all—to process it.” Julia swallows hard. “I need you to give me that time.”

“Anything you need—” I cut myself off and don’t call her babe.

She nods. “Okay.” Her voice is quiet, barely above a whisper.

I stand from the chair. “I hope we can talk again soon.”

“I just—”

“I know. I get it. You need time.”

“Yes.”

I climb into my truck as Julia watches me from the porch swing. I drive away.

Grandma Nola was right when she said I don’t have any patience. I’ve done all I can do at this point. I need to honor Julia’s request by giving her the time she needs. I won’t bother her, but I hope she doesn’t think I’m giving up. I’ll spend the rest of my life working to win back the only woman I’ll ever love.

Chapter Forty-three

Julia

Three days after my talk with Ryan, somehow life doesn’t feel like the world has crumbled on my head. I was right to tell Ryan I need time. Time to process everything and getting away on the trip to Denver will give me the time I need.

Ophelia Reynolds arrives for her appointment. A beautiful redhead who photographs like a dream—never a bad shot. Today she’s here for a boudoir session. I’ve known Ophelia since high school. Over the past few years, I’ve photographed her engagement, her wedding, and just recently, newborn pictures of her son, Jack.

When she enters my studio, she sets the baby carrier down on the floor next to her along with a diaper bag.

I look over her shoulder as she kneels to pull the blanket away from the sleeping angel’s face. “Look at him.” I rub my hands together. “He is absolutely adorable.”

The sleeping infant is in dreamland with his discarded pacifier resting on his chest. His tiny fingers lay on his lap.

“My mother-in-law had an appointment come up and she couldn’t watch him. Hopefully, he’ll stay asleep.”

The baby is so sweet. He makes my heart yearn for my own bundle of joy. I want to pick him up and snuggle him to my chest.

“He ate and got a diaper change right before I put him in the car, so we should be good.” Ophelia giggles. “For a while anyway.”

This is what Ryan will be sharing with Aubree. A baby. Their baby.

“You okay, Julia?” Ophelia’s eyebrows raise and her blue eyes glow in the lights of my studio.

“I’m sorry.” I try to bring myself back to the present. “Let’s get started with your session. You can step into the bathroom to change.”

As I work to get the camera ready, my client changes and returns in a white lace nightgown and robe which she has pulled tightly around her front. “I’m a little nervous,” she admits.

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