Page 20 of The Light We Lost

“Why not just take the money?” I refused to let Nolan sweep me off in a bridal carry just yet. I’d made too many rash, emotional decisions in the past, and I’d barely lived to suffer the consequences. “It’s there, it’s yours to take. Your dad will never know if you repaired your relationship with me or not. So why not take it? You wouldn’t have to split it with me that way.”

He huffed a laugh, giving me a smirk. That was enough to let me know he’d considered it. I wasn’t surprised—I would’ve considered it myself. But it was a surprise when he said, “The time for me to prove to you I’m a better man has come and gone . . . but I want to prove it to Dad.”

My eyes burned, and part of me wanted to be angry at his reasoning. But I knew it was the truth. Despite where their relationship had ended, Nolan loved his father. I’d seen and felt that love. I’d meant it when I said I grieved his dad. A part of me always would.

And I too knew what it felt like to be tangled in regret. It was choking me now. Guilt had the power to make people do drastic things—I knew that firsthand. I’d bet Nolan did too.

“There would need to be rules.” My voice trembled. I couldn’t believe what I was saying even as I was saying it. “Some sort of contract or guidelines.”

He rolled his lips together. “What did you have in mind?”

I had nothing in mind. Nothing beyond the pressing truth that I had no idea where my future was heading, not with the ties of my past holding me back. I needed to figure out how to convince the new CEO I was right for this job.Prove to my parents I was a different person. All of which was impossible to do because I was here. I’d been arrested in record time and sent my high school teacher running for the hills. At this rate, I’d be the only one left in this town, alone with broken dreams and promises.

But maybe this was an opportunity for me . . .

“It would have to be entirely platonic.” I wanted that to be clear right off the bat. “No touching, kissing. Absolutely nothing.”

“I assumed that was implied.” He smirked. “But it’s good to know I won’t have to stress about you putting your hands all over me. It might get exhausting fighting you off.”

“You were the one who could never keep his hands to himself,” I muttered before I could think better of it.

“And I seem to remember you enjoying it just fine.”

I glowered at him, one second away from calling this whole shindig off. Nolan must’ve understood that as he raised his hands in the air. “Alright, no funny business. Anything else?”

I blew out a breath, not letting myself second-guess what I’d decided. “Yeah, I need you to help repair my reputation.”

He sputtered a laugh. “If you bit someone’s ankles in New York, I’m sorry, there’s nothing I can do to help you—”

“Here. I need your help fixing ithere.”

His smile seemed to waver, hesitation in his eyes. “Indy . . .”

“People like you. It doesn’t seem to matter what you do—everyone falls at your feet.” To hell with pride. Nolan was desperate to show his dad he’d changed, and I was the same with Mom. “I can’t get anyone to come within five feet of me without thinking I’m going to throw hot oil on them, but maybe if you pretended you were okay with me . . . that you at least liked me, then maybe the town would let their guards down enough to see that I’ve changed.”

Nolan watched me, and I thought by the tension in his jaw he’d say no. But he must’ve needed this as much as I did. “Alright. I guess I could take you on a date or two. Let folks see us—”

“What?” I squeaked. “We just said no funnybusiness!”

“How else am I supposed to show everyone you won’t sic a raccoon on them if they cough in your direction?” He opened his arms wide, this time wearing a big ol’ grin. “If we want ’em to see you’ve changed, we’ve gotta give ’em a reason to look. And I’m sorry to say, you’ve got a reputation that has them lining their doorways with salt. But maybe if we can show them you mean no harm, and you’re just here for a good time, they might pull the stick out of their asses.”

I forced a laugh, willing the pressure in my chest to ease. I knew he meant it as a joke, but it hurt all the same. I might’ve been a nuisance as a teenager, but most of the time Nolan had been right there with me. Except they loved him.

He was the golden boy. The one with a bright future. The one who dreamed big. He was destined to put this town on the map. And me?

Well, I stole the golden boy’s dreams.

“Don’t you have a girlfriend or someone to take on dates?” I mumbled.

“You think I’d be doing this if I had a girlfriend?” When I didn’t respond, he clenched his jaw. “No, Indy. I don’t have a girlfriend. Do you have a boyfriend? Maybe a husband or two I should know about?”

“Just the one I can’t seem to shake,” I said quietly, this time with a tentative smile. Nolan returned it, and I thought it might’ve been the only honest one he’d given me in years.

I took a deep breath, truly considering my options. This was no different than what I did—or would do—for a living here in a few months. I’d seen several agents plan events or PR stunts to boost a client’s image. I’d even helped Evelyn plan a fake date or two for the athletes she represented.

“We’re not going on dates, fake or not.” I didn’t care if it was a good idea. I wasn’t an idiot. I read romance books. And I wasnotfake-dating my not-so-ex-husband. “But it would be a good idea if we did something together. Let the town see us beingfriends,” I emphasized, even though we weren’t anywhere close to friends. Friends didn’t let friends get wrongly arrested. “But I want to keep this between us. As far as everyone else knows, we’re divorced.”

“I’m not lying to my family,” he said, not missing a beat. “If they ask, I’m telling them. Otherwise, it stays between us.”

---