Page 127 of My Rules

Oh no.

“Why is that?” I force a smile. Please don’t kiss me.

“Because I’m hoping I get to kiss the girl.”

“Oh.” I smile nervously. He steps forward and his lips take mine and he kisses me, and it’s sweet and warm and nice.

Comfortable.

Not bad, actually . . .

I get a vision of Blake and Kayla kissing, and I step back from him, disappointed in myself. I desperately wanted the earth to move with that kiss.

But it didn’t.

“I’ll call you tomorrow.”

“Okay.” I get into the cab, and he closes my door and then waves as it drives away.

I feel hot and sweaty. I put my head in my hands in the back seat. Every time I think I’m ready, it turns out that I’m not. I don’t know if I’ll ever be ready to move on.

Gregory was nice. Gregory ticked every box. Gregory liked me ... but all I can do is be sad about Blake.

What the hell is wrong with me?

4:00 a.m.

I sit by the window and watch the street. Blake still hasn’t come home. I don’t know why I’m doing this to myself.

I mean, it’s obvious where he is.

But I needed to know, and now I do.

Right now, somewhere out there, he’s having sex with Kayla.

Chapter 14

Barry paces back and forth in front of the door as I sip my coffee and plot Blake’s murder. It’s Barry’s walk time, but of course Blake isn’t home from his date last night yet, so we all know that’s not happening.

I imagine myself ripping him limb from limb.

Barry paces and paces as he looks up at me all excited. Like, ugh ... “Fine,” I snap. “I’ll take you for your walk.” I grab his lead and open the back door, and Barry races outside and runs around with the zoomies. He runs full speed one way and then the other, then he circles the entire garden. I roll my eyes. I usually think it’s cute when he does this, but today, not so much.

I’m tired and I’m cranky and I’m well aware of why ... I hate men.

On Monday morning, I’m going to buy myself eight cats to grow old with.

“This way.” I hold up the lead, and he comes trotting over. I attach him and open the side gate, and right on cue, he takes off and nearly pulls my arm out of the socket, and I go flying forward.

“Barry!” I yell. I try to rein him in with all my might. “Don’t pull.”

“That dog is a menace in the mornings,” Carol calls as she waters her garden.

“Sure is.” I fake a smile. “Morning, Carol.” I wave.

“Hello, dear.” She keeps watering.

If there’s one thing I can always depend on, it’s seeing Carol in her pink dressing gown watering her garden every morning at six.

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