Page 61 of For the Love of Lily

“I love you. I always will. I’m only minutes away if you need me.”

Cassie opened the front door holding a massive tub of ice cream.

“Actually, I love you more than any boy,” I sobbed through tears. “Shall we get married instead?”

She screwed her face up. “You haven’t got the right equipment for me, sweetheart, otherwise yes!” We sat on the couch, wine in hand. “I knew it’d come to this, Lily. How are you going to choose?”

“I have no idea,” I admitted. “My boss is pissed at me already, so I asked for the rest of the week as annual leave. It would be too weird bumping into Zack. Am I OK to stay while I figure it out?”

“Of course, as long as you need.”

“He shagged some blonde girl in Iceland,” I sighed.

“The girl from the picture?” Cassie’s face was full of shock.

“Nope, that was a different girl. He didn’t sleep with that one.”

Cassie wrapped her arm around me. “Are you OK?”

I shrugged. “Not really, feel horribly sick whenever I think about it but… I have no right to judge, do I?”

‘That doesn’t mean it doesn’t hurt. This whole situation is beyond screwed up.”

I nodded and rested my head against her.

“I sort of… wanted to ask you a question anyway.” She had a weird look on her face; I couldn’t place it.

“Fire away,” I smiled back.

“You know I’ve always been jealous of your perfect skin.” I laughed and nodded. “Well, turns out I’m more jealous of your perfect ovaries.”

“What the… we don’t even know they’re perfect for a start, can’t see them. Don’t even know if they’re there.” I poked at my belly, wondering how many drinks Cassie had already had.

“Would you donate eggs to me?”

I spat my drink out in shock, watched as the liquid landed on the expensive material of her couch. For once, she didn’t care. I wiped my face and hands as she continued.

“You don’t need to sleep with Guy or anything weird. They take your eggs, mix them up with his sperm, then put them in me! Easy!” She looked manic, she was crazy nervous about this.

“Cassie! Sweetheart, I know you’re upset, but that’s not a good plan. How awkward would it be to know the baby was half mine? And I look nothing like you. We’re about as opposite as can be. Don’t you at least want a sibling who resembles your girls?”

“I don’t want an anonymous egg donor who could be any old weirdo or psycho, selling eggs for money. I want good DNA, and you have amazing DNA. Miss practically perfect in every way, who has two absolute hotties fighting over her.” Her forehead was bunched up in tension.

“I’m so far from perfect, you have no idea. Look, you’re still registering the news. Have you talked about it with Guy?”

“The idea of using your eggs? No. He’s up for trying egg donation. I feel weird about it being a stranger.”

I rubbed at my face again- why did every day get more confusing? “When me and Zack have kids, they’d be half siblings, that’s weird.”

Her face lit up. “You said ‘when’ me and Zack have kids! You’re choosing Zack, aren’t you?!”

“Cassie, I’m worn out. Can I go collapse in the granny flat now please? So much to think about. It’s not a definite no, it’s just… a big decision.”

It was a no. It was a definite no. I just needed to find the right way to tell her.

Twenty One

Despite my mind being in overdrive, I fell asleep straight away, tucked inside the granny flat. A week of non-stop stress and sex would do that to you.

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