Page 16 of The Proximity Factor

As she should. I squeezed the pillow tighter. “Does anyone blame me?”

“No one would think that of you. But the whole town is buzzing over jerkwad coming to see you at the hardware store.”

“Ugh,” I muttered. I knew the gossip was inevitable, but I hated it all the same.

“It’s a good thing you’re in Athens. The man came into the restaurant today, asking me where you were living this summer.”

I bolted upright. “What? Are you serious?” Mama told me she’d had to run him off last night when he’d come by my apartment above the hardware store. Not sure why he thought I would be there. Everyone in town knew I was doing this disastrous social experiment. Apparently, he was moaning and wailing, begging me to open the door and saying he’d made the biggest mistake of his life by breaking up with me. Even more ridiculously, Mama was sure she saw a ring box in his pocket.

He was insane to think I would ever marry him. Maybe I should call the state medical board. Not sure he was well enough to treat patients. Perhaps an MRI was in order.

“Yep. I’ll give him that: he has some cojones—cojones that are going to get kicked if he comes back again,” declared Val.

“I can’t believe this is happening,” I whined. “He probably just got cold feet and used me as an excuse. The pig.”

“I don’t know about that. You are pretty amazing, and from the sound of it, he wants to marry you.”

“My ACT scores weren’t high enough for him.” Yeah, he’d asked me about them.

“I guess he decided that knowing the atomic weight of hydrogen isn’t all that important after all. Idiot,” she added.

“It’s one point something or other, by the way. The atomic weight of hydrogen. I looked it up.” Although I felt like crying, I mustered a half-hearted laugh. I’d done my best to get over Greg. It hadn’t been easy—I thought he was the one. And there was a time not all that long ago when I would have said yes in a nanosecond if he’d proposed. Not that I have any idea how fast a nanosecond is. And I’m not going to bother looking it up.

“Color me impressed. I had no clue. Pair that with your knowledge of how to properly accessorize, and you’re a genius. And he’s a fool for ever walking away from you.”

I did have a knack for accessorizing any outfit. “He should have stayed away.”

“Obviously, he’s the dumb one. Now he’s out a nurse, a fiancée, and a ton of cash from the sound of it. According to Emmy, whose cousin is the best friend of Meribeth’s maid of honor, Greg was footing the entire bill for the wedding.”

“That’s weird. I thought Meribeth came from some wealthy family from Monroe County.”

“I thought so too. No doubt there’s a story there.”

“I, for one, don’t want to hear it.”

“Well, I do.” She evilly laughed. “But I’ll keep it to myself if I find out. You know, unless you change your mind.”

“Only if the ending includes Greg winding up in prison or something.” Other than that, I wanted to forget Greg Pearson ever existed.

“Ooh, I like that ending. Let us pray.” Val’s southern accent came out in full force.

“I’m not wasting another prayer on that man,” I declared. “Besides, I kind of got the feeling God doesn’t like it when I pray for Greg to lose all his bowel functions in a public place.” Something about blessing those who curse you and despitefully use you. Greg had certainly despitefully used me, but I wasn’t a good enough person yet to pray for him to be blessed. Maybe someday I’d get there, but today was not that day.

Val giggled. “I’m sorry this is happening to you. Glad he doesn’t know where you live right now.”

I shuddered, thinking about him showing up here. “Me too. I can only handle one jerk at a time in this house.”

“Do you need me to come make Parker into a Dateline episode?”

I sighed and lay back down. “No. He’s not bothering me. He’s even leaving the toilet seat down now.”

“So why are you so bummed about him? I know it’s more than you just wanting to save humankind,” she teased me.

“Hey, that’s a worthy goal.”

“I promise you we will find a different way to save humankind that doesn’t require you living with a wannabe elf lord.”

I laughed. “I’m not sure he wants to be an elf lord.”

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