Page 83 of Beyond the Fame

“Rebecca.”

“Jensen, please. These past few days have been wonderful, and I don’t regret any moment I spent with you... but the timing just isn’t right.” Defeat washes over him, and it hurts my heart. “You know our paths will cross again. We always find each other. Let’s make a deal.”

His head jerks up, his eyes hopeful.

“A year from now, when you’re back, we’ll reconnect. I don’t know where I’ll be, if I’ll have book tours, but we'll find each other. We always do. Maybe next time will be the right time, the right place.”

I’ll wait for you. I’ll wait because I love you.

How do I say that out loud? What if I say those words and he decides he no longer wants to go to Hungary? I can’t let him miss this great opportunity for his career.

I turn away before his face can convince me to stay. His beautiful face that I just know is full of pain and disappointment right now.

My flight is at 6 a.m. I was originally scheduled to leave on the same flight as Jensen. But after he told me about Hungary, I called my assistant the moment I got to my room, the room I haven’t slept in this entire damn trip and had her rebook it for first thing this morning.

There was no way I could sit next to him on that plane after what I said last night.

Sleeping without Jensen’s strong arms around me last night felt wrong. I tossed and turned and got maybe two hours of sleep.

After gathering my nerves to emerge from my room, I find him on the couch. His arm is tossed over his eyes, leg propped on the back and mouth hanging open. He makes a light whistling noise every time he breathes in and out.

Is he out here to catch me before I leave? Would he stop me or tell me goodbye?

I wish I could take everything I said back. I wish I could go with him. I want us to be together. But how do we begin a relationship when he’ll be on set all day? I’d be so bored and lonely and frustrated and end up hating him. It would never work out.

I sneak around, trying not to wake Jensen as I gather my belongings. He stirs when I open the door, then he turns to cuddle up to the couch cushions.

I force my feet to walk out, and I cry all the way down the hallway, in the elevator, and in the car to the airport.

Chapter 21 – Jensen

4 years ago

That’s a wrap. Filming for Tyler’s Team is officially over. Well, almost over. We still have to do two more weeks on a sound stage and a green screen for the hospital scenes. Mylan can’t lose enough weight to appear sick, so we’ll do it with special effects.

Mylan.

I can’t believe how great he’s doing with his recovery this time. I was worried when I learned Lana wasn’t coming to Jonesboro with him for the two months we’ve been filming at the college. She seems to be an anchor for him. But the two months flew by, and Mylan came to set on time. He was alert and performed amazingly.

I get back to my hotel room when the sun is rising, and I crash on top of the plush bed. The moment my head hits the pillow, I fall asleep.

The next day, I order some room service, scarfing down a burger and fries before packing up my luggage and heading down to the lobby to check out.

Instead of flying back to L.A., I hop in a hired car to drive me three hours back to Silo Springs, where the town is hosting a wrap party for us. I don’t think about how I'll likely see Rebecca again. It might be the last time we see each other until press for the movie. Though, I’m sure she’ll request we don’t get paired together during the day-long junkets.

I pass the time by sending a few emails and making some calls on my next project: a science fiction movie that I’m so fucking hyped to direct. Before I know it, the driver is slowing down to pass through the town’s downtown area.

The wrap party is being held at a small convention hall owned by the city. Cars already pack the parking lot, so the driver drops me off at the front. He'll find a parking spot and wait. I only plan to stay a couple of hours before I head to Memphis to fly out.

Music hits me when I open the glass double doors. People are crowded around the stage dancing as the band plays a cover of an Aerosmith song.

I search for familiar faces: Mylan, Lana, Bruno, Ginger, Eloise, but can’t find them anywhere. That’s weird. Are they not here yet?

My eyes stop on a gorgeous brown-haired woman, flirting with Shane, one of the camera guys from the film. She’s breathtaking tonight, wearing black stilettos and a strapless black dress that falls mid-thigh. Thighs that are covered in patterned tights.

My body fills with jealousy when she places her hand on Shane’s arm. I stomp over there to break them apart. Then I realize that’s insane because she’s not mine and I’m not hers, so I swallow my jealousy and compose myself by the time I reach them.

“Hey, Jensen,” Shane says.

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