Page 151 of The Penalty

A pleasant grin slanted his mouth. “You remembered.”

“You still have to introduce him to me.”

“Come to the match and I will.”

“I’d be there in a heartbeat if I could.”

“I know, love.” Xavier cast his eyes down. “I mean it. I’ll fly to you if you want. All this distance is killing me.”

We both know he didn’t mean only the physical distance. Our emotional connection was frayed.

“Me too. Let’s make an effort to talk again. Like this. No more generic check ins.”

When Xavier looked at me, my stomach fell. His guard was up. All the progress we’ve made in our relationship teetered on the edge of a cliff.

“Have you been doing okay after what happened with Jordan?”

Neither one of us has broached this topic head on since the night at his townhouse. A phantom hand burned around my neck.

“I’ve had a few restless nights. I try not to think about it. Have you been doing alright?”

Another round of poisonous rage crept into his eyes. “I still don’t know where he is. As soon as I find out, I’m putting an end to this.”

“Please don’t do anything impulsive.” The words felt hollow coming out of my mouth. I couldn’t stop him any more than I could stop an out of control freight train.

“It won’t be impulsive, trust me.” Malice weaved through his tone. “He’ll be sorry he ever put his hands on you.”

“Premeditated isn’t any better,” I snapped. “I love you for wanting to defend me but I can’t handle the thought of you getting hurt or losing your career over this.”

Xavier’s shoulders stiffened. He stroked his neck again and nodded. Part of me sensed he only backed down out of respect for my feelings but the look in his eyes said otherwise. Walls of tension pressed closer and closer around me.

A knot formed in my throat. My chest hurt, my lungs hurt, my heart hurt. Everything fucking hurt.

“I wish there was a way to stop him that didn’t involve you beating the crap out of him at every turn. You can’t keep doing that, Xavier. I will not lose someone else I love to that piece of shit.”

The room went silent except for the low hum of my computer. Distant voices echoed in the hallway. This didn’t feel like my office anymore.

It was an airtight prison.

One I needed to leave sooner rather than later.

The expression on Xavier’s face oscillated between doubt and determination.

“Talk to me,” I pleaded, my voice barely rising above a whisper. “Don’t shut me out.”

“I’m not shutting you out. I’m—” He exhaled, running a hand through his hair. “There’s just so much to say.”

“Then tell me something easy.” My voice softened. “Tell me something about yourself. Something I wouldn’t learn in news articles or player bios.”

He remained quiet for a minute before he spoke.

“I didn’t tell you all of it.” His voice held an uncharacteristic tremble. “About what happened with my father.”

The phone nearly slipped from my hand.

“I left out what I overheard him say to Rebecca one night. They thought I was up in my room but I’d gone downstairs for a drink. I heard voices in the living room. My dad sounded upset.”

A quiet knock sounded on my office door. Hannah poked her head inside, saw my face, and abruptly left. Xavier was lost in his own memories and didn’t notice the interruption.

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