Page 123 of The Penalty

An uneasy twinge fluttered through me. It really wasn’t like him to go radio silent, especially if we’d planned to talk.

I glanced at the blurry photo of what I assumed was me in a red dress and scowled. Now that I’m splashed all over the gossip sites, it shouldn’t surprise me that someone would stir up trouble. Just because I remained civilized about my encounters doesn’t mean others will do the same.

The April version of me wouldn’t be so bothered by messages like this. I’d have responded with a smart ass one-liner and gone on with my life.

Actually, the almost-September version of me would still do the same thing.

Seriously, screw this fucking person.

I grabbed my phone, typed go touch grass, and hit send.

Satisfied, I put on some pajamas and crawled into bed. Sleep was just about to welcome me with open arms when my phone chimed. I groaned into the pillow. It must be Killian so I chose to ignore it.

A few seconds passed before it beeped again. And again.

“This better be good,” I muttered, grabbing the phone.

Mildly Hot: Are you still up?

Mildly Hot: Tori

Mildly Hot: Answer me

My hands went clammy. Xavier never texts me at this hour. It’s the middle of the night in England. And middle of the night rapid-fire texts never led to anything good.

Me: What’s wrong?

The phone rang in my hand when he started a video call.

“Hey.” I answered, studying his face. It was pale and drawn. Dark circles shadowed his normally vibrant eyes. Christ, he looked awful.

“I’m sorry.”

Tightness squeezed my chest. “For texting so late? Don’t be.”

“No. For what I did.”

“I don’t understand.” Exhaustion spread across his features but his eyes dilated with the wildness of overwhelm. “Have you been awake all night?”

“Yeah. Mostly. I guess.” The keyed up way he answered tore through me. “I was at dinner with Cade. I didn’t know he’d be there. I relived it again. It hasn’t happened in years. And he was there. Right fucking there and I went after him. I wanted to fucking kill him. I did it for—”

“Xavier, breathe.”

“—you. Just like I had to after you showed me your sister’s journal. I had to do something. I couldn’t—”

“Xavier, please listen to—”

“—let him get away with it. I’m tired of—”

“Xavier.” I kept my tone calm and even. “Focus on me. Look at me.”

Breathing fast, he stared at me but didn’t quite see me. I’ve had enough anxiety attacks to recognize the beginnings of one.

“Listen to the sound of my voice, okay? I need you to take a deep breath. Slowly. In. Out. That’s it, just like that. Can you do another one for me?” I inhaled and exhaled with him. “Perfect. Keep looking at me, Xavier. You know how much I love those pretty blue eyes.”

I guided him through more breathing exercises, inhaling and exhaling with him. After a few minutes, he started to calm down. All I wanted to do was wrap him in my arms and never let go.

He ran a hand through his hair, looking a little lost.