Page 38 of Their Queen

As I reached my destination, I fell to my knees, a gasp of horror falling from my lips. A couple hung from a post whose original purpose was now indiscernible, their faces and bodies mangled beyond recognition, but what truly left me in shock was the smaller forms hanging next to them. Children.

I screamed out in pain at the sight, unable to process what I was seeing. “NO! Why?!” My voice broke on a sob as I stared at the evidence of what Titania was willing to do to those that stood in her way. Just when I thought I had a grasp on her depravity, she proved me wrong. These innocents had died because of my need to stand up to Titania. These children had done nothing wrong, and yet they had been caught in the war between two queens.

How could she live with this on her conscience? Better yet, how could I?

Chapter Twenty Six: Lennox

We watched as Rhowyn sobbed on her knees in front of the children who hanging, our hearts breaking at the devastation and depravity that Mother’s soldiers had left behind, all of us dumbfounded by what we saw. I knew my mother, knew that she was all of these things, but I had never stopped to consider just how low she’d sink to obtain the power that she craved. It had always been tempered before, the desire for power hidden behind closed doors, but since Rhowyn’s arrival, that had all changed. Now, it was as if she didn’t care who knew or saw. She was no longer hiding, not afraid of any of us stepping in to stop her, already believing she was unmatched.

Terror at the idea that she was right, that we would fail, swept through me. This was just the beginning, her first overt moves. If she was willing to cause this kind of havoc and destruction already, then what line wasn’t she willing to cross? What wasn’t she willing to do to succeed? In my gut, I knew the answer to that question. Absolutely nothing. Nothing would stop her unless we did.

Movement pulled me from my shocked state. Rhowyn’s wails still sounded out, and the memory promised to haunt me for a long time to come. Callum started moving purposefully, Arryn jerking from his stupor to follow. They strode to where the bodies were hanging, no words spoken between them, each set on their combined task. Callum pulled his sword as he made the final steps to the bodies, his eyes watering and body taut with unreleased fury and pain as Arryn wrapped his arms around the first child. The blade sliced easily through the rope that held the tiny figure. Arryn caught the body as it fell, no longer supported by the rope, before setting it gently on the ground. They repeated the process as Rhowyn stared vacantly into the distance, numb and wrung out from her emotions until all of the bodies had been removed.

Baer, Brannoc, and I searched through the ashes looking for more bodies, ones that weren’t too badly burned, to move to the pile that Callum and Arryn had created. We worked silently. There were no words for what we were witness to. Nothing that we could say to each other or Rhowyn that would erase the events of today.

I found a partially burned body in the last building, embers jumping and sparking as I gathered the young fae female into my arms, emotion and ashes choking my throat. Looking around, I realized that we had now searched the whole village. Fifteen. Fifteen bodies were all that were left of this once-thriving town. Fifteen souls that hadn’t been reduced to nothing more than ashes, no one left alive.

Wetness ran down my cheek as I laid the last fae next to the others, and I looked up, expecting to find rain. It wasn’t until I noted the bright day and cloudless sky that I realized I was crying. As if that realization had broken the dam, more tears fell from me. Sorrowful tears of mourning. These people had been innocent. They hadn’t chosen sides, and yet they had paid the price of my mother’s ambition.

Falling to my knees, I let myself feel the emotions that threatened to drown me under the waves of despair. My eyes tracked Arryn’s movements as he used his magic to dig graves, one at a time, to bury our people. He remained stoic and impassive as he worked, but I could tell he was in the same boat as we were. His military training was the only thing keeping him from succumbing to the emotion, but I had no doubt that later he would let himself process the events of today. Later, he would allow himself to break as Rhowyn already had.

Once he had driven the last wooden marker into the ground to indicate where these innocents would rest for eternity, the sounds of horses approaching drew all our attention. All except Rhowyn. She still hadn’t moved, and I was really beginning to fear for her. Baer tried to go to her, speaking softly, but still, she didn’t respond. She just gazed into the distance, her eyes hollow and blank.

I recognized the people on horseback, the soldiers we had left in Kilmond. They’d finished their clean up and caught up to us. Had it been that long already? Looking up to the sky again, I caught the pinks and oranges that indicated that, indeed, evening was now closing in on us.

The soldiers’ eyes widened as they rode down the main street to see us at the end, their heads swiveled to take in the destruction that had been wrought by the flames. They didn’t have to ask; one look at us, and it was evident what had happened here. Arryn approached the soldier in the lead, the one he had left in charge, and asked, “Are the horses good to make it back to the Keep tonight?”

“Yes, Sir,” the soldier replied simply as Arryn nodded. He walked over to Rhowyn, attempting again to get her to respond. When she didn’t react, he turned to us. “Mount up. We’re going back tonight to regroup.”

I found the reins of my horse, mounting as he’d instructed. Once seated, I looked at Rhowyn to find Arryn sweeping her up into his arms, only to be met with the same response. He walked over and handed her up to me, and I wrapped my arms around her. One hand held her waist to steady her while the other held the reins. As soon as Arryn was mounted, we started moving.

We rode in silence for hours. Rhowyn’s blank expression and lax body was really starting to concern me. I’d never seen her like this. The strongest woman I had ever known, hell, the strongest person I’d ever known, was broken by the sight of my mother’s depravity.

Callum rode up next to me, his brows furrowed in concern, as he asked, “Nothing?”

I shook my head in response, sending a prayer to Avalonia for her strength and for her to help Rhowyn when she needed more than what we could give her. Something like this could make a person give up on the world, give up on everything. I begged Avalonia to give her the fortitude to keep going, swearing that we’d do everything in our power to help her through this.

“Come back to us, Princess,” I whispered into her ear, hoping beyond hope that she would respond. Her muscles tensed under my hand that was still on her stomach, fingers spread to hold her close. “We need you to come back. We all need you stop her,” I continued begging.

She didn’t respond again as we rode for another thirty minutes, the gates coming into view. Then I heard her whisper, so faintly I was afraid my mind was playing tricks on me, that my desperation to have her back with us was making me hear things. “Why?”

Choosing to go with it, to not doubt myself just in case I wasn’t wrong, that she was finally starting to snap out of it, I answered her in the only way I knew how, with honesty. “I don’t know for sure, Rhowyn. I couldn’t begin to guess what it gained her except maybe the hope that you’ll back down and be scared away from acting. The only answer I can come up with is that she was hoping to break you.”

A shiver ran through her body, an inhale, and then I felt a drop of moisture on my arm as I held her. “Just when I think I have a grasp on what evil is capable of, I am always proven wrong,” she admitted through her tears, her voice cracking as she spoke so softly, as if she was speaking more to herself than to me.

“I know, Princess. Trust me, I know.” I closed my eyes as my voice broke, my own emotions threatening to reduce me into a sniveling mess. My mind played back all the memories of my mother’s cruelty as if I could ever forget.

I wasn’t sure whether it was a survival mechanism or willful ignorance, but it seemed that between episodes, I always forgot just what she was capable of. At least until I was confronted with more evidence. Then everything came rushing back, and I was left with shame for having forgotten. Yet, if I hadn’t pushed those scenes from my mind, shoving them deep down inside of me, I would have broken long ago. I wouldn’t be here to comfort Rhowyn, to help her through this, to fight back the darkness with her. Hiding from the truth was like that sometimes. Necessary to keep moving forward in life but always there in the background, threatening to burst through at any moment to tear your perfect little world apart. The truth never went away, and as much as we tried to run away from it, it would continue to haunt us until we could face it. It would always prevail, but how we responded to it was the difference.

Somewhere along the way, I had found my strength in Rhowyn and faced some of my fears and truths, so now I wasn’t so devastated by it. I sent a prayer up to Avalonia, this one of thanks because everything I had been through had led me to this moment. This opportunity to dwell in the sorrow and horror with Rhowyn so I could pull her from it. The fates had forced me into a life of terror, but somehow, I had found a way to build armor for myself. Scarred and battered on the inside by what I had faced up to now, I was better prepared to confront this darkness at Rhowyn’s side. Together, we’d rebound from this more honed and stronger than ever. I’d lend her my strength until she found hers again, but I wouldn’t leave her in that pit of despair to suffer alone.

I tightened my grip on her waist. “I’m here for you, Princess. With you. Don’t forget that you have us all here when you’re ready to face it. We’ll tear her limb from limb for everything she’s done, but we need you to come back.” To emphasize my vow, I tugged on our bond, sending my commiseration down the line, my understanding and strength. She could have it all as long as she came back to us.

Chapter Twenty Seven: Callum

My eyes kept darting from the terrain in front of me to Rhowyn’s still form, the Keep just on the horizon. She hadn’t moved since discovering just what Titania was capable of. A part of me felt guilty that I hadn’t warned her about what Titania’s true skills were, but how did you go about telling someone who hadn’t fully experienced the immoral and perverted actions of another? How did I explain just how deep that rot ran?

The answer was simple; there was no true way to convey just how deep it went. I could have described it in detail until I was blue in the face, but it still wouldn’t reach the level of understanding needed until faced with the reality of it. It was one thing to hear about the horrors of war but another thing entirely to witness it. The smells, the sounds, the sights. Descriptions only went so far. Words would never truly be able to elucidate the depths of what someone experienced.

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