Page 12 of Examining Ella

She was now acutely aware that she was in fact not dreaming.

“What’s g-going on?” she said.

“Well, Little Ella, I’m afraid you passed out again. I think it was an anxiety attack, but we’ll give you a quick exam to make sure.”

She was covering her face with her hands now. Her words came out muffled, filtered through her fingers, as she said, “Why are you here?”

“Honey, you don’t have to be nervous or embarrassed,” he said in a patient, paternal tone.

She liked the way it felt when he called her honey. It went a little way in easing her mortification—but she still had a long way to go.

“Think about it,” he continued. “If I’m on this cruise, then that means I’m a—”

“Daddy!” she said, lowering her hands and sitting back up again.

She was a little wobbly, but he put a steadying hand on her shoulder.

“Breathe deep,” he encouraged. “You’re going to be fine.” He kept his hand there, not pressing down too hard but reminding her that he was there.

“Is it okay if I move away?” he asked after a minute.

“Yeah. I’m fine,” she said.

He stepped back where he could look at her. “Do you remember what happened out on the deck?”

Ella was so nervous she couldn’t even speak. Her mind was still reeling as she tried to grasp what was occurring. A little sliver of her brain proposed the idea that all of this—not just Dr. Kirk’s presence, but the entire cruise itself—was nothing more than a long dream. She’d wake up back home, in her own bed any moment.

But the rest of her brain rejected this, reminding her yet again that this was no dream.

She read the concern on the doctor’s face.

“I can speak,” she said, trying to calm his fears that she’d hurt herself or was experiencing some other sort of medical issue.

“There’s no rush. A panic attack can be debilitating,” he said. “Please. Take all the time you need.”

She nodded.

Despite the circumstances she found herself in, excitement slowly crept over her, fighting with the anxiety and somehow winning the battle. She felt her toes stop tingling. A warm sensation bullied its way into the pit of her stomach and tangoed with the sickening, anxious one.

The warmth somehow won.

You don’t have to hide that you’re a Little anymore. You don’t have to wonder if those Daddy vibes from Dr. Kirk are real or in your imagination. You’ve been handed a golden opportunity. Thank the Universe and run with it!

“I remember,” she said. “I was getting nervous because I’m…being Little…in front of people for the first time. It was kind of overwhelming.”

“Sure. I can see where it would be,” he said.

He stayed there, leaning his butt against the counter, his arms crossed, while he looked at her. He was still wearing his white shorts and light blue T-shirt. It clung to his muscles, highlighting his sculpted chest and bulging shoulders.

Mmm. Yummy. Positively yummy.

Seriously, Ella. Don’t mess this up. You’ve been handed your dream-come-true on a silver platter.

“Do you feel better now?” he asked.

“I feel great! Now.” She didn’t mean to say it so eagerly. She chanced a glance up at him and saw him smiling.

“Good,” he said. “I need to look you over. Just to make sure.”

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