Page 80 of Holding On

After he's gone, I check my phone but don't see any messages. I wonder what Ethan's doing. After the way he treated me, I shouldn't care, and yet I do. But I resist calling him. If he wants to see me or talk to me, he'll have to be the one to reach out.

***

Around eight, I take a long shower, then toss on sweats and a t-shirt, preparing for a night of watching TV and eating junk food on the couch.

Just as I'm sitting down, the doorbell rings. I answer it and find Ethan standing there on his crutches, wearing faded jeans and a white t-shirt, his hair mussed up like he just ran his hands through it. He's annoyingly hot. The kind of hot that causes girls to make bad decisions.

"Hey." He glances down, then back up.

"What are you doing here?"

"I wanted to see you."

"Why? You told me to leave, remember?"

"Yeah. About that. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have done that."

"No. You shouldn't have."

"It was just that I didn't expect the coach to show up and I was..." He takes a breath. "Never mind." He looks at me. "I was being an ass. I'm sorry."

At least he seems sincere. In the past I've dated guys who say they're sorry but don't mean it.

"You want to come in?" I hold the door open and step aside.

"Is your brother here?" he asks as he walks into the apartment.

"No. He's on a date with the girl downstairs."

"The one he met when the fire alarms went off?"

"Yeah. Heather. I only met her one time but she seemed nice." I watch as he stops and adjusts his crutches under his arms. "How'd you get here?"

"I took a cab."

"You could've called me."

"I didn't think you'd come pick me up."

"You're right. I probably wouldn't have."

He steps closer to me. "Will you forgive me?"

"Maybe." I turn my head to the side. "It depends."

"On what?" His hand goes under my chin, turning my face back to his.

I look into those deep brown eyes and feel myself falling under his spell. I swear that's what it is. Why else would I be so desperate to kiss him? He told me to leave. I should be mad at him.

He lowers his lips to mine and softly kisses me. I kiss him back, feeling like I'm about to make all kinds of bad decisions. I'm usually better able to resist a guy's charm but I can't seem to do it with Ethan.

"You want to sit down?" I ask, forcing myself to back away before the kiss turns into something more.

"Sure." He follows me to the couch.

I pick up the remote. "I was just getting ready to watch TV. I don't know what's on."

He's quiet as I flip through the channels. I stop when I find a movie. We watch for a few minutes, not saying anything.

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