Page 85 of Still Love You

She smiles, noticing my slip-up. "You're no longer with him?"

"No," I say, feeling sad just saying it.

"Is he here?"

"Yeah."

"That's tough, especially when you still love him."

Is it that obvious I love him? So obvious that even a total stranger notices?

"Ready for a refill?" She's holding the pitcher and reaching for my glass. I hand it to her and she fills it up, then gives it back to me. "Did he cheat on you? Is that why you broke up?"

"No. I'm the one who broke up with him." I take a drink and notice this batch is even stronger than the last one.

She pours a glass for herself. "If you love him, why'd you break up with him?" She hops up on the counter, her legs dangling as she swirls her finger in her drink.

"Because I just didn't see a future with us. Silas and I want different things in life."

"He doesn't want to get married? Have kids? I had a girlfriend who dumped her boyfriend because he didn't want that. It was too much commitment for him."

"It's not that. Silas wants all that."

"And you don't?"

"I do. But I also want a good career. I want to run a large company someday, which means I'll have to work a lot of hours and travel a lot. I probably won't even have time for a family."

"No offense but that sounds horrible. Spending the rest of your life in an office? Or on a plane?" She licks the margarita off her finger. "I mean, it's good there's people who want to do that. It's just not for me. That would suck the energy right out of me. I like working at a bar because it's such a high energy environment. I love it. It doesn't even seem like a job."

"Do you think you'll want to do that forever?"

She shrugs. "Who knows? I'm not one of those people who plans out my future. I believe in doing what feels right in the moment. If someday I'm not happy at my job, I'll quit and find another."

She's just like Silas. This is the type of girl he should be with. The fun, laid-back, live-in-the-moment type of girl. She probably doesn't even organize her closet or her sock and underwear drawers. I organize everything, to the point it probably drove Silas crazy when we were dating, although he never said it did.

"You want some more?" She holds the pitcher over my half-empty glass.

"No thanks."

She turns to face the patio, still seated on the counter. "So which one is he?"

I search for him but can't see him with all the people in the way. "I can't find him. He was standing by the pool but he must've moved. He has dark hair, tall, muscular, wearing a black t-shirt and jeans."

She whips back to me. "Holy shit, that was your boyfriend? I saw that guy earlier and almost begged him to go out with me, but he was talking to some other girl."

"He was?"

"I can't believe you broke up with that guy. He is HOT."

"And sweet. Thoughtful. An amazing kisser." I go to take a drink but she grabs my cup. "What are you doing?"

She sets my cup down and hops off the counter. "Get out there."

"Why?"

"Go get your man before someone else does."

"He's not my man. Silas and I broke up."