Page 166 of Master of My Heart

She’d never thought about it like that before. “But Ramon... They all told me what a sick, twisted person I was to like what I was doing.”

Chase pulled her close and cupped her chin. “They were playing with your mind, Sabrina. Twisting it. What they told you was a lie. You’re not sick and twisted. You’re... adventurous.”

“Adventurous?”

He shrugged. “I couldn’t think of a different word.”

She inhaled deeply. “But are you... adventurous?”

His eyes lit up and he grinned. “Yes. Very adventurous.”

“Really?” She blinked several times.

He traced her cheek and tapped her nose. “Yes, Sabrina. Being in the Brotherhood does lend itself to some adventurous sexual experiences. I enjoy them all.”

She giggled, but when she realized what he’d said, her smile fell. “You’re still going to be a part of it if we get married, though, right?” she asked in a quiet voice. “What happens at those Gathering things?”

Chase turned serious, not answering right away. “The Brotherhood controls the world using the most powerful act known to man. Sex.” He looked at her. “Sex relaxes people. It invigorates them. It can be used as blackmail, seduction, and outright control.”

“So, when Richard said I’d be ‘well attended’ there, he meant that lots of people would want to have sex with me?” she asked sadly.

Chase nodded. “It’s what you’re meant for, Sabrina.”

She stiffened and swallowed hard. “I don’t want that,” she said in a choked voice.

“You need to go and see it. You need to understand what goes on there, then maybe you’ll be able to accept it better.”

Her face screwed up as she tried not to cry. “Don’t you understand? That’s what I was for years.” She stalked a few steps away across the grass and turned back to face him. “How can you tell me to go to one of those things when you know about my past?”

“A Gathering is nothing like your past, Sabrina,” Chase said forcefully. “I know it’s hard to understand, but why would I lie about something like this?”

“Men always want something from me,” she spat.

“The only thing I want from you is for you to be happy,” he said, stepping closer.

“Would you stop being a part of the Brotherhood if I asked? If you knew it would hurt me?”

“I can’t do that.”

“Why not? It’s a free country.”

“Once you become part of it, you’re not free like that anymore.”

“And you want me to be part of it?”

He sighed and ran his fingers through his hair. “It’s not like that, Sabrina. I have obligations as an Elder-Son. I cannot go back on my promise, on my commitment I made years ago. It was a choice I freely made and it can’t be undone.”

“Would you change it if you could?”

He didn’t answer right away. “No. Because I believe in it.”

“But you’re not free.”

“I wasn’t free in the army, either, and I made that choice, too, because I believed in it. I believed in the greater good and was willing to give up certain things because of it. The world is bigger than our petty little human lives. I can’t sit by and do nothing if the opportunity presents itself. I have to do the right thing.” He sighed and softened his tone. “And whether you like it or not, you’re a part of it, too. Your very existence is your part in it.”

Sabrina didn’t know how to react to his words. Her body shook and her mind circled around memories of her past abuse. “I want to go home,” she whispered, wrapping her arms around herself. She couldn’t think straight and needed to be alone.

“I know it’s hard to understand but—”

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