Page 19 of The Other Princess

She made a noise that sounded like she was attempting to laugh, but couldn’t follow through with the sentiment for whatever reason. “Your word means nothing to me.” She turned her back on all the men in the room and started walking to the back hallway that branched off to the right and left. I knew the left would take her to Zeke in the lounge and the right would take her to her apartment. She glanced back over her shoulder before she chose which way she was going to go. “I’ll let you know what I decide.” Then she turned left to go to Zeke, and my stomach dipped before knotting up with anxiety all over again. For the first time since I set out to right everyone else’s wrongs I wondered if I had done the right thing by bringing them here and demanding even more from her.

Chapter 10

~ Ever ~

What just happened out there?” My question was directed at Zeke who sat with one leg crossed over the other as his booted ankle rested over the ripped spot of his jeans just about his knee.

Zeke eyed me for a moment and then patted the couch next to him. “Come sit down. We need to talk a minute.”

Anxiety immediately flooded my system with a boost of adrenaline, probably my third hit for the day which was going to mean either I was going to crash spectacularly in a short while or I was going to be up for two days straight. I never could tell how my body would react to stress.

“You need to figure out what you want from them before you move forward with anything.”

“What exactly do you mean?” I asked the question; because I had a feeling he wasn’t just talking about whether or not I wanted to tattoo those men.

“I mean you need to decide if you want a relationship with those people again, and if you’re willing to put what happened in the past and leave it there for good.” He looked me right in the eye as he spoke, and it felt like he could see right into my damaged soul. “My mom had a lot of hate for my old man for some shit he pulled when they first got together. It tore them apart for a while, but finally he convinced her to take him back. The thing was, she never let it go. She never put that shit behind them for the fresh start they were supposed to have. She threw it in his face every chance she got. Every time he did anything slightly out of step she was ready to fling past hurts on him.

“The thing is, by doing so, she was hurting them both, and as a result me and my sister too since we had to listen and hear all about how my dad was a cheating scoundrel once upon a time.” Zeke blew out a breath and went on telling me his family’s business. “My dad still swears, to this day, that he never stepped out on my mom except that one time, and that he knew when he was doing it that he was fucking up the best thing he ever had. When he got her back though, he thought he was getting that same sweet girl back. He had already damaged her though. She wasn’t the same anymore, and he had to live with what he’d done, and how it had changed her.

“The problem was she couldn’t let it go, couldn’t move on, and get past it. Because of that, they never had a chance at starting over. My dad stuck it out with her long enough to produce kids somehow, but by the time I was seven and my sister was nine he couldn’t handle it anymore. He couldn’t handle seeing how the blowback was starting to affect his kids either. Hell, I remember the day my dad sat my mom down and gave her the reality of their situation.” Zeke didn’t look like he actually wanted to tell this part so I just sat and waited patiently until he got his thoughts together.

“He told my mom that I had asked what cheating was and why he had done it. He told her I then asked why mom hated him so much, and why telling her sorry didn’t work. He told my mom if she couldn’t get over shit that was nearly a decade in the past that they had no business being together, because he wasn’t going to have his children poisoned against him based on one mistake he made before they were ever born. My mom fell apart on him that day, I remember because I was peeking and listening in on their conversation. She said she would do better, but you see once you let that bitterness fester too long it becomes a habit. Not a week later my dad was late coming home from work and had forgotten to stop off for the milk my mom asked him to get. She was on a tear, yelling at him, accusing him of cheating again. Telling him she hoped whoever the woman was she was worth the fact his children didn’t have milk to drink.”

“That’s brutal,” I interjected before he went on. Zeke nodded his head in agreement though.

“It was especially brutal, because the reason he was late and forgot the damn milk was that he was getting her a brand new ring to celebrate the fresh start she’d finally given them.”

“Oh no!”

“Yeah, instead of handing her the ring he quietly got up, walked upstairs, and started packing a bag. He came back downstairs, handed the bag to her, and told her she could come back for the rest of her things once she had a solid place to stay.”

“How did she take that?”

“Not very well,” Zeke admitted. “She started yelling and screaming at him telling him she wasn’t the one leaving the house because she hadn’t done anything wrong. Screamed at him to get his shit and get his cheating ass out. That’s when he pulled the ring box from his hand. My mom shut up then, and stood there stunned. My dad opened the box and showed her this gorgeous three-carat sapphire and diamond ring, then he looked her in the eye and explained how he had to wait on the jeweler to finish up since he’d made sure it would fit her finger. He told her, ‘I thought we were truly starting new this time so I wanted to commemorate the occasion with this ring to show how serious I was and how thankful that you finally found it in your heart to forgive the young man I was for the one horrible mistake I made. I can’t continue to be your punching bag though. I made that clear before. I won’t allow our children to continue seeing all this anger directed towards me for something I haven’t done since before they were born. I finally get that you can’t find it in your heart to forgive me. Maybe one day you will. For now though, you need to go see someone, and work on the anger you can’t control. I’ll pay for it, because I helped put it there, but I won’t put up with it any longer. You need to get help. Once you do, you can come see the kids and we’ll discuss where to go from there.’” Zeke paused in the telling of his story then, and when he didn’t pick it back up I had to ask.

“What happened? Did she get help?”

“No, she didn’t. She left that night and went to look for help in the bottom of a bottle. When that stopped working for her she eventually started looking for help in drugs. Eventually, the drugs took her from us. She let one incident in her life define her, muddy a relationship that could have been great again, and taint her children’s lives. So, when I ask what you want it’s because I don’t want to see you travel her path, Ever.” He grabbed my hand and held it sandwiched between his two larger ones. “If you want to forgive and try again with these people, then give it all of you. If you don’t, then walk away clean and cut those ties so the hurt doesn’t fester.”

“Thanks, Zeke,” I told him as I leaned up and kissed his stubble-roughened cheek. “I’m sorry about your mom, and I promise I won’t end up like her.” With that, I left to go to my room and contemplate exactly what I wanted out of this venture, and if I had anything left to give any of them.

I had taken most of the rest of the evening to think about everything, and I still was unsure of how I felt or what I wanted to do. I was so frustrated that the thought of maybe going out and getting completely fucked up on something actually flitted through my mind a couple times, but then Zeke’s message to me would make me feel guilty for even thinking it. Again.

My cell ringing felt almost like salvation, and as a result I ended up answering without looking to see who was calling. “Hello?”

“Holy crap, I can’t believe you picked up,” a familiar male voice huffed out on a breath.

“Jay?” The question his name posed was really something like, what the fuck are you doing calling my phone? It didn’t matter, I had already picked up, now time would tell if that would be a mistake. After another moment of silence I asked again. “Hello?”

“Uh, yeah, sorry. I guess I never expected you would actually answer my call. I’m guessing you only did because you didn’t see who it was.”

“You’re not wrong so far. Do you want to get to the point, or should I just hang up now?”

“Jesus, fuck! Yeah. I just wanted to tell you that I really think you should do the tattoos, even if I end up with a giant dick jizzing all over my ass like a tramp stamp.”

“That’s a hell of a visual. Thanks for the idea,” I deadpanned.

“I’m serious, Ever. Do your worst. You’ll never know how fucking sorry I am, and how much what I did to you kills me. I fucked up bad, and there wasn’t really any fixing it once it went so far. Doesn’t even matter how the brothers made me pay for that shit either. Hell, they damn near kicked me out of the club for it, and even if they had it still wouldn’t have been enough.” He paused a moment, and I wasn’t sure if he was waiting for me to say something, agree with him, or disagree. It didn’t matter because I had nothing to add at this point. Again, he wasn’t wrong, yet.

---