Page 86 of Gifts

Taking over, his kiss deepens—rough and greedy. “Lift, baby. I can’t take another second. I need to feel your pussy.”

I do as he says and he yanks me down, filling me—filling me with much more than just his cock.

I feel my eyes go heavy as I start to rock, wanting him more than anything. His hands come to my hips to take over, and every time he pulls me onto him, I want more and need it harder. I’ve never been able to orgasm during sex before Asa, but he seems to make everything possible.

I’m close and breathing hard. We’re face-to-face, our breaths mingled with moans, whispering on one another’s lips. I’m close and want it so badly, I move faster. Asa’s grip tightens on my ass to help, and at that moment, the words tumble from my mouth before I realize what I’m saying. “Don’t leave me.”

Asa freezes, making me gasp from the sudden loss of friction. I try to keep going, but he holds me in place, and I swear I’ll have bruises from his fingers digging into the muscles of my ass.

His expression is a mix of surprise and anger. Realizing what I’ve done, I try to lean in to kiss him, but he surges to his feet. This sudden movement is such a surprise, I have to hang on, but not for long. He presses my back against the cool marble and cups my head with his big hand.

Now, it’s all Asa.

He’s not just fucking me—he’s ravaging me.

I come almost instantly—my voice echoing through the floor-to-ceiling carrara surrounding us. He’s holding me tight, which is good because I’m limp as Asa groans into my neck, his orgasm chasing mine.

When I finally feel my toes again, I wrap up his muscled body as tight as I can. He holds me where we are, letting the water run over us. When he pulls his head back far enough to look at me, he whispers, “I get it.”

Still trying to catch my breath, I bite my lip.

“And I’ll prove it to you,” he adds, but it comes out as a promise.

Damn. In pure Keelie fashion, I choose to say nothing. It seems I’m becoming somewhat of a chicken-shit. I’m embracing it and hating myself for it, all at the same time.

Well, if this isn’t another Saturday for the record books, I’m not sure what is.

*****

I didn’t think it was possible, but Asa has been even more possessive than ever. It’s Sunday and almost dinnertime, but we’re heading out soon to pick up Levi and Emma at the airport. Knox and Saylor are so excited to surprise Emma with her new puppy, you’d think it was their idea.

It’s been a slow day at home. After last weekend, I decided to skip brunch with my family—much to their consternation. I had to put up with all the phone calls from Aunt Lillian Rose and my mother, not to mention the texts from Stephie. But I didn’t care. I wanted a day at home, and even though it’s been odd, it’s been a wonderful type of odd. An odd I could become addicted to.

Asa helped Knox and Saylor with the animals while I did my best to walk Emma’s puppy around the yard, trying to persuade him that this is his territory rather than the inside of my house. It’s starting to warm, so we had lunch on the patio, and ever since then, Knox and Asa have been busy working on a model rocket Knox got for Christmas.

Knox is smart, but this rocket from my parents was over his head. I’ve been meaning to get it out and help him build it, but there aren’t enough hours in the day. It almost broke me, when, at lunch, Knox hesitantly brought it up to Asa that he needed help. When Asa told him they’d tackle it together, I had to make an excuse to go inside to collect myself, which I hated more than anything. Losing control makes me feel weak.

By the time I was able to come out from my hiding place in the pantry, Knox was running downstairs with the kit. Asa was there waiting on him, but his eyes were on me. Never missing a beat, he could see right through me and came over to kiss my temple before commanding to Knox that they, “get with it,” so they could shoot it off before dark.

“Mommy!” I jump and shift from the kitchen window where I’ve been watching Asa and Knox. Saylor comes running into the house on a huff. “Are you gonna come? They’re about to shoot it off!”

I smile at my daughter, who’s been in the middle of rocket-building mania all afternoon. It’s a wonder they were able to finish with her jabbering and crawling all over Asa the entire time.

“Yeah, baby. I’m coming.”

She’s jumping up and down at the back door waiting on me, but her next words stop me mid-step.

“Is Asa gonna be our new daddy? ‘Cause, I like him.”

All the air leaves my body and I fumble for my words. “I … I don’t … ”

“Come on!” She runs to me, not waiting for an answer, grabbing my hand to pull me out the door. “We’re gonna miss it!”

For the first time in my life, I thank God for her short attention span. I have no words, let alone an answer.

But now I do know what’s going on in my daughter’s head, and as I get the first glimpse of how happy my son is after spending the afternoon with the man who’s warming my bed, I can only imagine what’s in his, too.

I’m still hovering in a weird space between fear and something strange and unfamiliar—but fear is tipping the scales. Since Asa has entered our lives, I’ve been all over the emotional spin-o-meter but, until now, I’ve never landed on fearful.

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