Page 109 of Milo

I'm unable to hide the smile forming on my face. "Yeah, I am too." I bite my lip, mustering up the courage to be nosy. "Did you uh—know her well? Vittoria?"

"Mmm… Not really, I only met her a handful of times. Milo had only been dating her for six months before she—" She swallows. "It wasn't very long."

"Six months?" A lot of feelings can emerge in six months. Or six weeks. Hell, six days is plenty for some people. Ask Jane Austen. "How did they meet?"

"I believe they met at a club." Julia clears her throat, averting her gaze. "She was a dancer."

I blink. "A dancer?"

Julia twists her lips as she tosses me a meek glance. "A stripper."

"A stripper?!" My eyes bug out of their sockets. "Oh, okay. That's cool. You know, I read once that stripping requires lots of training. It's like a sport, really, very athletic. There are even competitions and?—"

"You're rambling, cara." Julia cocks her head to the side. "It is okay if you feel a bit uncomfortable."

"What? Me? I'm fine.” I expel a nervous laugh. "Not a big deal. Really. It's just a job." Readjusting my sweaty grip on the shopping bags, I ask, "So, uh, what was she like?"

Julia tosses me a dubious side-eye. "Why do you care, Kiara? It doesn't matter, she is not your competition."

"I know that… I just—I'm curious is all."

I don't want to push Milo into talking about her. Frankly, I don't want Milo to think about her. I want him to think about me. Only me. I want to be the first thought that crosses his mind when he wakes up and the last when he falls asleep.

Is that bad? Am I terrible for wanting that? Milo said that the pain from losing a loved one never goes away but I want his pain to go away. I want it to disappear. I want to scrub away the stain she left on his heart. I want it gone. I don't want to be a second choice. I don't want to live in her shadow.

I don't want to be a consolation prize.

Julia inhales a deep breath as Gio opens the car door for us and we slide inside. She faces me, revealing, "Vittoria was very, uh...vivacious. From what I remember she enjoyed being the center of attention, cocktails, and umm...she talked a lot. As I said, I did not know her well."

"Oh—"

"Kiara…” Julia’s tone is gentle as she places a hand on my forearm. "Do not compare yourself to her, that is the worst thing you can do. She is gone, cara. She is not a threat."

I fiddle with my fingers. "It hasn't been that long since she passed away, Julia. What if he's not over her yet? What if I'm just a distraction? A band-aid?"

"You are not a band-aid, cara.” Her raw faith punctures my self-conscious heart. "You are a cure. You are healing him; I can see it."

"Most cures have side effects.”

"That is true, but they are usually temporary. The cure, however, is permanent."

If I'm a cure, I think I need to start giving him larger, more powerful doses.

I need to pump his body full of me.

And get rid of all of her.

When Julia and I enter the estate, I catch the back of Luisa's head as she turns a corner down the hallway.

"Luisa!" I call out, grabbing her attention. She stops and circles back toward us, eyeing our shopping bags, a barely noticeable frown marring her groomed brows. "Do you know where Milo is?"

"He and my father were gone for most of the day," she says. "I think he is in his office now." She bites her lip, scanning one of my bags. "You went to Mimibella? Did you like it? It is one of my favorite boutiques. Claudia is fantastic, no?"

"She was great," I say, reading her vaguely disappointed expression. Hmm. "Did you uh—want to come with us next time?"

If I'm going to be living here for the next foreseeable future, I should try and expand my pool of confidants. Julia's not going to stay in Italy forever. Once she leaves, I'll only have Milo. He's more than enough but he's busy. A lot.

"Yes! Excellent idea!" Julia chirps, looking up from her phone. "We go again on Saturday, yes?"