Page 27 of Beyond Reason

“Hm,” I grunted, but his eyes were already flickering down my body to the obvious response I had tenting the workout shorts I wore.

“Hm?” He arched a brow and took one hand from the bar. It didn’t stop him from leaning against the metal, and if I was being honest, we both knew that I wasn’t fighting him to regain control. I knew what I needed to do, but I couldn’t seem to find the strength to do it in the wake of his touch.

“Shouldn’t you be running?”

The words made me shiver, because he’d said the same thing to me a dozen times before… only…

Well, when he’d told me to run, there was a completely different purpose to it. I’d always been more than happy to play his games, more than happy to let him win.

And my body was reacting the same way now, as though I wasn’t trying with every ounce of my strength to keep myself away from him.

“I…” Fuck, what was the right answer here? “I should probably… go… take a shower.”

“Mm, no. I don’t think you’re finished with your workout yet, Axel. Besides, haven’t you been reminding me from day one that it’s always important to make sure you cool down and stretch?” He tilted his head, then slowly let go of the bar he was holding. “Keep that there, yeah?”

Fuck, he posed it like a request, but I could hear the demand behind the words. For some reason, I was incapable of disobeying.

It was the same reason I’d always been unable to deny him when his voice came out in that smooth command. Even though I’d convinced myself the best thing I could do was resist this, to resist him, my body went pliant for him like he hadn’t been gone for twenty years, like it had just been waiting for him.

Because it had. Of course, it had. My breath came out in a soft exhalation when I realized I wasn’t getting up, I wasn’t running.

“Good boy.” Xavier’s silky tone tore a shiver along my spine and nearly gave me the strength to get up after all. If I gave in to this, I wasn’t sure how I was going to go back to living without it.

If I gave in to this, I wasn’t sure I’d be able to tell him no ever again.

But it was apparently already too late, because he’d circled around the weight bench to my legs hanging off the edge, and he was smoothing his fingers along my skin with a wicked grin across his face that told me he wasn’t doing this out of concern for my recovery after a workout.

Instead, he brushed upward and slipped one hand behind my leg, pressing my knee toward my chest until I could feel the burn of it trailing all along the back of my thigh.

“You always told me to be thorough. Do you remember? I want to make sure you’re taking care of yourself, Axel.” With one hand holding my knee up, he used the other to trail down the back of my burning muscles. His cool fingers slid inside the shorts I was wearing, and a sound caught at the back of my throat. I wasn’t sure if it was a protest, because he cut me off with a gentle shhh that made me swallow it down. “Always so ready to listen, aren’t you? Fuck.”

He shifted, straddling the bench and forcing me to part my legs to make room for him. I could have gotten up. I still could have pushed him away and told him I was doing it for his own damn good.

Instead, I gripped the bar I was holding tighter and watched down the length of my body as he trailed his fingers along the band of my shorts with a curious expression that seemed to burn.

“You know, I was a little shocked when I first saw you, but you haven’t really changed all that much, have you?” Xavier slid his fingers to my hip bone and gave a gentle squeeze—it sent a jolt of tingling desire racing along my nerve endings and drew another low sound from my chest.

It made him smile.

“No, you haven’t changed. I still know every place that makes you feel good, Axel. I still know exactly what turns you on.” As if to prove his point, he slid my gym shorts down and my traitor of a cock slapped upward against my stomach, proving that I was obviously responding to his touch whether I wanted to admit it or not.

“Xavier…”

“Shhh,” he said again. He splayed his fingers across my abdomen slowly. The weight and warmth of his hand spread through me, pressed me back against the bench more than the bar I was holding. “Let me touch you.” His eyes flashed up to mine, and I could see it for just a second. The way he was just as desperate for this as I was beneath his warm, demanding voice. The way he needed me.

I need an anchor.

“Okay.” The word came out as a whisper, and then, “Yes.”

I’d never been able to tell him no.

In that one syllable, his expression broke in a flash of something soft and needy and vulnerable, like a part of him had wondered if I’d still say yes.

Fuck, I really hadn’t stood a chance, had I?

For a second, he just brushed his fingers along my exposed skin, the dip of my hips and the tops of my thighs. Each touch was something I’d dreamed of a thousand times, something I thought I’d never have again. Each touch was something that I shouldn’t have allowed myself to have now, but I was past worrying about that.

Tomorrow. I’d care again then.

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