Page 178 of Heart of Frost and Scars

“It was petty of me to bring it up. I’ve forgiven you.”

“I haven’t forgiven myself. I will apologize and grovel for the rest of my life.”

“Please, don’t.” I stare down at my bourbon, the memory of that video playing in my mind. “After I saw the recording of you with her, I swore I would never love again. I would never trust another man.”

“I know.” His jaw tightens. “I hate myself for that.”

“I don’t. Despite my resentment, I fell in love again. Leo and Kody brought me back to life, gave me something to hold onto, and proved that I’m not broken.”

He takes a deep breath, gearing up to say something, but the server enters with a delicate assortment of oysters, caviar, and lobster bisque.

Each bite is a luxurious experience, but I can barely taste it. My mind whirls with all the things unsaid between us.

We eat in silence.

His hand rests on the table next to mine, but he doesn’t touch me. His eyes, however, caress every inch of my body, running up and down my green minidress. A dress that clings to my figure and reveals more than it conceals. The plunging neckline exposes my chest from throat to abdomen, my nipples barely hidden by the thin fabric.

I know he personally picked out this dress. He’s always had a thing for my small boobs in green.

We move on to the main course, a perfectly cooked steak for him and a seared salmon for me, paired with an exquisite bottle of Bordeaux.

I try to keep the conversation casual, but my heart isn’t cooperating. It pounds so hard I’m sure he can see it in my exposed chest.

“This is nice, Monty.” I tip the wine to my lips. “You didn’t have to go through all this trouble. I’m just glad to be off the island.”

“I can’t bear to see you unhappy.” He sets his fork down and paws a hand through his hair. “It’s killing me, Frankie. The guilt…”

“Guilt?”

“I’m responsible for your misery.”

“What?” The salmon lodges in my throat, and I grab my water, gulping it down. “How?”

He presses his lips together, and for the first time since we arrived, he takes his eyes off me, darting them around the private dining room.

Two guards stand outside the door. Two more patrol the perimeter of the restaurant.

He’s not worried about the security. He’s stalling.

“You arranged an intimate dinner,” I say. “If you have secrets to share, the moment is now.”

He takes a long swig of his whiskey, drawing my attention to his thick throat, the way it jogs with each swallow. If I pressed my nose to his skin, I would smell traces of fine Italian leather and smoky vetiver beneath the sweet-earthy, musky-marine aroma of his aftershave.

I miss his scent.

“I helped Leo and Kody pursue their dreams to distract them.” He meets my eyes. “I knew their careers would consume them and keep them busy. I knew it would keep them from you. I needed them out of the way so that I could win you back.”

“You wanted to win me back by keeping me isolated?”

“I’m a monster. I knew what I was doing. I still know what I’m doing. I can’t stop.”

“Jesus.” My heart flinches.

“Here’s the kicker. You’ll enjoy this part.” He braces an elbow on the table. “I’ve grown to care about those guys on a level that fucks all my monstrous plans to hell. As it turns out, I actually want them to be happy.” He huffs a self-deprecating laugh. “I bought boats for them last week.”

“You what?”

“And motorcycles.”

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