Page 56 of Witch You Weren't Here

‘Sometimes I even wished I could just be “normal”,’ he continued. ‘To not be a witch at all … and I’ve seen that you choose not to use your magic—’

‘That’s what Madam Hedvika said I had to do. OK? She told me to stop using it, to clamp down on every impulse.’

‘Permanently?’ His husky voice lowered to a barely audible murmur and her stomach lurched at the suggestion too.

Which was stupid. How was it possible to think she would miss something that had only ever caused her pain? That she’d never really experienced fully as part of her life.

‘No. Not permanently. Until I’ve figured out … until I know what the problem is. Because it’s gone totally screwy. It shoots off when it shouldn’t. Causes mayhem. Almost exposes me. It’s a nightmare. It is a curse.’ She pressed a hand to her stomach. If she pictured her magic as a well, then the water was poisoned. And leaking out into cracks. ‘I can’t use it. She told me not to, and I need it to be fixed, because what if I ruin Joe’s wedding? What if I end up hurting someone?’

‘You won’t—’

‘Harry. I think the sofa bed malfunctioning was me. You could have broken your foot or sliced open an artery or something. I’m a menace.’

He was quiet for a moment, his face so solemn it made the weight pressing down on her chest heavier. ‘I get that you’re scared. Of all those things. But the fact remains, if we don’t even try right now, you are going to miss that ferry. And probably Joe’s wedding. What have you got to lose by giving it a go?’

‘Maybe our lives? The car could explode.’

Harry raised his eyebrows. ‘I doubt it.’

‘I set fire to that corn husk doll.’

‘A small doll that is basically tinder, is not the same as—’

‘A car full of highly flammable fuel?’

‘Oh, for the love of the goddess, fine! Have it your way. Just stop arguing with me. I’ll think of something.’

He turned away from her, linking his fingers at the back of his neck and staring off into the flat black night.

Kay rubbed the snow away from her eyelashes, angry at him and angry at herself too, because it turned out that saying sorry and kissing your teenage crush didn’t automatically fix all your problems, personal or joint.

Even more annoyingly, a lot of what he’d said made sense. She had been so eager for her gift before, he was right about that, but him throwing that knowledge in her face just stirred up all her resentment about the years they’d lost because he hadn’t trusted either of them to be able to deal with his problems.

He turned back without looking at her, and moved to the boot, fiddling with the catch. His hands trembling and practically blue from the cold. He popped it open and started rooting around inside.

‘What are you doing?’

‘Looking for something, anything, that might help,’ he muttered.

He was shaking, and she couldn’t entirely say it was the cold because she could feel the energy coming off him, whether she liked it or not. The desperation. Was that something she’d always been able to do? Something she had inherited from her mother without realising? Or was she just tuned into Harry and his moods, because this was so unlike him? Or unlike him to show it.

He clearly wanted to make that ferry.

And she needed to make it. She couldn’t miss her brother getting married. Sure, she might have a magical accident at the wedding – but that was a risk whether she clamped down on her magic or not. Somehow, it had only been a day since she’d seen Madam Hedvika.

‘OK, OK.’ The words ripped out of her, but she touched Harry’s shoulder gently, to stop him from crashing around in the boot, where he’d not found much except a tyre pump and an empty box. ‘I’ll try.’

Harry leaned on the rim of the boot for a second, before he straightened and looked at her again. ‘I’m sorry, Kay. I’m sorry I’m asking it of you. Honestly.’

‘You’ll be even sorrier if I turn the car into a lump of smoking metal.’ She said it as a joke because the shininess of his blue eyes was undoing her. He was looking at her with such a strange mix of gratitude and regret.

‘You won’t.’

She started to shake her head again, objections rising to her lips, but he stepped closer and put his hands on her shoulders.

‘You can do this. I know you can.’

The cold air caught in her throat, the snowflakes whirling around them as a heat kindled in her stomach. And not the kind that was linked to how much her body responded to his proximity. No. It was like her magic was warming beneath the intensity of his belief in it. In her.

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