Page 13 of Catfish

Then Mama got cancer.

Not only did it flip our whole world upside down, but it formed a cloud of fear that always hovered over Marty and I's heads. It left the unknown in our wake every single day to the point of insanity. Conning and dealing was our own way of managing it. I could barely focus in school, Marty couldn't stay out of fights, Mama was stressed and overwhelmed—it was then that we learned to lie low and fight back.

The clothes money for Marty and I went right back to paying a bill. We didn't need them, I could just steal what we lacked. We just required a roof over our head, food, and Mama alive.

That was her only job.

And it continues to be her only one for as long as I can help it. She's the only thing he and I have. We had Aunt Jenni, Sadie's mom, as kids, but she never had to understand what it felt like to live in the poorest slums of Connecticut and fear the night. Dread the next day because you'd be on the streets again, not knowing what or who you'd be running into.

My microwave suddenly shouts at me, announcing that my pasta is done, and I sit at my kitchen island to eat, suddenly not very hungry anymore.

Reminiscing on the past isn’t something I delve into very often.

In fact, I avoid it like the plague for so many other reasons and fuck-ups that I've done.

I don't even recognize myself in the mirror anymore. Apparently, I could function decently when Marty was around, but the moment he left for the Marines, I went down a downward spiral.

Buzz.

Chase: I have fantastic taste in food.

Me: That only helps me when I’m hungry.

Chase: I’m a great listener.

Me: You better be if you’re a lawyer.

Chase: You’re killing me over here.

Me: Already ran out of things to talk about?

Chase: Haha, not even close. Did you think all I could do was keep a woman around with my good looks?

Me: *smiley face*

Chase: You’re cruel and all types of asshole, Sox.

Me: Starting with my choice of baseball and football team, I presume.

Chase: That and your lack of confidence in me.

Me: You’ve kept me around this long, Yank. I’m a hard woman to please, you probably should’ve stayed clear of me.

Chase: I’m a lawyer, remember? Hard is my life.

Me: Yeah?

Me: I could take that in so many different ways.

Chase: With me, you'd have to.

Me: Don’t tease a girl.

Chase: I don’t tease, only taunt a little. You’d get a free orgasm out of it, so it’ll be worth it. I promise.

Me: Do you use that line on all your potential matches?

Me: Because if you do...as my good deed for the day, it sucks.

---