Page 56 of Dare To Fall

“You look.”

He picks up the cell and swipes across the screen, then silently turns it to show me. A photograph of my sketchbooks strewn across the floor; the pages inside torn to pieces.

My jaw clenches. She accused me of enjoying my role in all of this, but how the fuck can she expect me not to react emotionally, even while I know she’s not at fault? This is my life, my soul, they’re shredding.

An alarm dings on my cell, and I pull it out of my pocket. “I have an appointment with the counselor.”

“Keep it together.”

“Yeah.” Easy for him to say. He’s not the one who has to keep up this fucking act.

I drain my coffee and make my way to the counselor’s office. He’s waiting for me when I get there.

“Come in. It’s been a couple of weeks since we caught up. How are you feeling?”

Angry. Exhausted. Drained.

“Fine.” I drop into the chair opposite him and stretch out my legs.

“I heard there was another clash between you and Arabella last week.”

I shrug.

“Eli, this won’t work unless you talk to me.”

“There’s nothing to say, other than it’s difficult to stay away from someone who won’t leave you alone.”

“Retaliating just escalates the situation.”

I tip my head back and look at the ceiling. “You think I don’t know that?”

“Emotional reactions are never helpful. You need to take a step back when she does something. Stop being reactive and start being proactive.”

I frown and slowly lower my head until I’m looking at him.

“You already know that she’s angry with you. She is lashing out because of what she thinks you’ve done. Being reactionary is only going to make things worse.”

“You mean I should be prepared in advance, and just lock down every emotional response I want to react with?”

“I … no, that’s—”

“You know.” I straighten in my seat. “That makes sense. I should plan in advance how I’m going to respond to the shit she pulls. That way I’m not clouded by emotion when she finally makes a move.” I nod. “Yeah, I like that. Thanks, doc.”

I jump to my feet, already thinking about the ways I can prepare in advance. If I have a plan of action, I can retaliate quickly instead of having to wait. Maybe even preempt their plans. If I get Kellan to go through the original texts, maybe we can pick up on what their endgame is.

“Eli, I—”

“You’ve given me a lot to think about. I’m going to cut this one short and go do some work on my art project. Thanks.” I’m out of the door before he can say another word.

My cell chimes with an incoming message just as I reach the room housing my sculpture. I check it while I unlock the door.

Kellan: You should come back to the cafeteria right now.

Me: Why?

Kellan: She’s pinned the sketch you did of her nailed to a cross on the noticeboard. Just sashayed right in and stuck it up there.

A photograph is attached to the text—my drawing in all its glory.

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