Page 87 of Kadra: The Unfeeling

“It does to me.”

I think about it. I think of the little girl who always felt like it was her against the world. The little girl who loved fiercely but loved only ended up hurting her.

I think of the things that brought me joy back then and what kept me from losing myself to the pain.

“My cello,” I whisper, feeling vulnerable like I’ve never felt before. Not even when he saw me at my worst. “I would play my cello for an audience.”

There I said it.

Now I feel way too much at once and I don’t know what to do, what to say or even where to look. I don’t like feeling this exposed. Is uncharted territory.

Needing a second to pull myself together, I look around the room and focus on the people happily chatting all around us without a single care in the word. Then I see it.

I recall the waitress’s words from earlier.

It’s just that you look just like the woman on the wall.

The woman on the wall indeed looks just like me.

Dark brown hair falls around a face identical to my own. A face with sugar skull makeup. The painting even has my eyes. They look almost like liquid gold. The mural is breathtaking.

It can’t be… right? It must be a coincidence.

But I’ve never been one to believe in coincidence.

Just fate.

Dragging my eyes from the mural, I look at Vitali. But just before I open my mouth to ask him a question a young and handsome man approaches our table with a welcoming smile towards Vitali. “Boss, good to see you here. It’s been a while.” Then he turns his attention to me giving me an appreciative look yet it does nothing.

“Jeffrey,” My Russian greets him without looking away from me.

Then we’re both alone again.

“Vitali.”

“Yes, kotyonok?”

Thump.

My eyes lock with his.

“One last question.”

He nods. “Ask.”

Taking a deep breath, I do, “Why did he call you boss?”

“Because that’s what I am. His boss.”

“You own this place?” I ask, sounding surprised. “How? Why?” This is my city. How the hell did I not know this?

Vitali studies me over the rim of his glass before tipping what’s left of it back. “I needed a legit reason to keep coming back.”

It takes me a minute but then I understand.

He settled down roots in my city so he could come and go as he pleased. So, he could be near… me?

I’m so lost in thought trying to calm my racing heart that I don’t notice him leaning forward until I feel my entire body going rigid when Vitali cups my jaw, gently and swallows my next breath.

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