Page 116 of Bastian

PART III

“What was life before him?” - A

ARIANNA

LIFE AND DEATH

“My stupid heart won’t let you go.” — A

The constant beeping sounds of a machine wakes me up from the deepest sleep I’ve had in years, but when I try to open my eyes, I feel a little groggy and there’s a sharp sting on the back of my head. And why do I feel as if I have been run over?

Everything is blurry when I manage to fight the fog and open my eyes.

Once my eyes find focus, the first thing I see is white.

White ceiling, walls, and furniture.

And the room is so cold.

Why is it so cold?

“Hey there, kid. Stay down.” I recognize Benjamin’s soft voice as he pushes me back down onto the bed gently.

“Where am I?” I look down at my bandaged arm and then up at Benjamin in confusion. “W-what happened?” I croak out when my throat feels like it’s burning, as if I smoked three packs of cigarettes.

“You’re in the hospital,” Benjamin says.

The hospital…

That’s when it all comes back to me hitting me at full force. Hurting me.

Annihilating me.

The gala.

Sebastian showing up.

Us dancing while he sang along to a John Legend song like a fool while my heart was beating so hard, trying to get out of my chest and fall at his feet.

The feeling of peace I got while he held me as we danced like no one was watching and then… Then the gunfire and the blood.

So much blood.

And his eyes…

Those blue grays I love so much were smiling through the pain.

Smiling so I wouldn’t feel scared.

Oh, God.

“Sebastian!” My eyes are wild, and my heart is racing, I try to get up, but Benjamin holds me down with a somber look on his face. No. No. Please, God not him. Not my tyrant. “Calm down. You’ll hurt yourself.” He pins me to the bed, so I don’t hurt myself. “Fuck, kid, please calm down.”

With my good hand, I grab his. My eyes blur with tears as I ask in a voice so low I think he doesn’t hear me, “How…” Clearing my throat I try again. “Is he…?” I can’t finish the sentence. I can’t, but Benjamin doesn’t need me to.

My friend’s eyes turn sad but before I lose my mind with the thought of the man I love leaving me forever, he puts me out of my misery. “The motherfuckers got him. Two bullets to the chest. The doctors were able to remove the bullets, but some fragments hit the heart and caused damage to the fine arteries. He also lost a lot of blood. The doctors did their best, but the rest is up to him now. He was moved to the ICU. Fuck, he…” Benjamin looks away from me, swallowing hard. I know that face. He is beating himself up, most likely for not being there.

“What is it?” When he doesn’t look my way, I snap. “Dammit, Benjamin. Tell me!”

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