Page 43 of Bastian

He managed to suck the air out of a room without much effort.

His mere presence did that.

He turns the tables on me, and it only infuriates me more because I know something inside of me shifted the moment my Ella revealed the reason why I was away from her.

Reaching the stars.

The world is yours.

It’s too much.

Pressing a hand to my chest, I feel my heart beating rapidly, almost as if the traitor knows the man who used to own is close by.

So close.

So, I run.

Like a coward, I run, leaving him standing in his own little bubble because the painful truth is that I no longer belong with them.

He made that painfully clear.

So yes, like a coward, I move towards the other end of the room where the air doesn’t feel as heavy or bittersweet.

Where I’m able to breathe.

Damn you to hell, Sebastian.

I should have expected you would do the unpredictable.

You never played fair.

In life or in games of the heart.

ARIANNA

FORGET ME

“Forgive and forget? Fuck that, and fuck you, too”. — A

Before I even saw him, I felt his presence. It was as if I had a sixth sense or something when it came to this man. “Are you hiding from me, darling?” His breath so close to my neck causes goosebumps to spread over my skin, taunting me with the fact that he still has that effect on me. Ignoring my obnoxious reaction to Sebastian’s closeness, I pick up my third glass of wine of the night without acknowledging his presence. Because when all the techniques I was taught by a very expensive therapist to control my anger failed, I turned to alcohol. It might cloud my judgment, but it does a good job of numbing me.

Because of this man.

Because even when time has passed, when I saw him, it feels as if no time had passed at all. It feels like it was yesterday when I first fell in love with the idea of him. The illusion turned out to be nothing but lies.

A facade.

Yet here I am, drinking to numb myself, to not feel any of the emotions he still stirs in me.

What messes with my head is the fact that this enigma of a man looks the same, yet also not. His black hair is cut short, the curly strands are long gone.

And somehow, that makes my chest ache.

I thought I was ready…

Maybe I fooled myself into thinking the past wouldn’t hold power over my thoughts and actions, but here we are. Memories of every second I spent with this man hit me full force until I suppressed them, shoving them to the back of my mind and focusing on the pain seeing him causes. The pain of feeling him this close.

It serves as a reminder that he’s not that man.

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