Page 1 of Playing My Rivals

CHAPTER 1

DORI

This is the moment every person searching for love dreads most, the moment where all your fears and hopes meld into a single defining moment.

When it comes to a head, this moment has only two possible outcomes: it could give me everything I've ever wanted or rip it all away and leave me broken. Now, Jamison Stone and I stand staring into each other's eyes, facing a crossroads.

I stay planted where I am in his kitchen near the island. “You’re asking me to leave? Is that what you really want? Because if it is, this thing between us, whatever it is, will be over for good.”

His storm-filled eyes rake over me. He slams the front door shut and stalks toward me like a lion determined to get his lioness. Our eyes lock and all the sexual energy that has built up over the years erupts.

He cups the side of my face with his hand, wraps his other arm around my waist and pulls me into him. I should stop this from happening until I have the answers I want, but I don’t.

I step into him and my eyes fall shut. My heart spins like a tornado crashing and causing destruction in the wake of its path, but I don’t care. I want this.

He smashes his lips against mine, and our tongues twist together. For a moment, it’s all I’m aware of. There’s tenderness laced with raw need as his mouth takes ownership of mine. It’s all I’ve ever wanted. And I’m swept away by his desire.

He grabs the back of my hair and tugs, dipping my head back. He nips and sucks on my lips, growling low, husky moans as he does. I press my hands to his chest to stabilize myself, then pull away slowly and gasp for air. We stare into each other’s eyes.

It’s the most passionate kiss I’ve ever had. The room is silent except for the unspoken questions hanging in the air between us.

Can I trust him to keep my heart safe?

Is he finally saying I’m worth the risk?

His heart pounds hard and fast beneath my palm. He takes in a breath to refill his lungs with air. His pupils are dilated like he’s ready to take me into his bedroom.

I step back, but his hand remains gripping the nape of my neck, holding me like he’ll never let me go. And a part of me doesn’t want him to, but I need to know where this leaves us. I take another step back.

“What does this mean, Jami?”

He runs his thumb over my lower lip and his sparkling blue eyes connect with my soul. “One day, Dori, I’ll do this and you won’t be thinking of Hunter. You won’t stop or push me away. You’ll want it and you’ll want it with me only. Until then, I won’t do that again.”

“What are you talking about? That kiss had nothing to do with him. Why would you even bring him into this?”

“You can’t deny he’s part of this. He loves you and you have feelings for him. I want all of our issues resolved and the obstacles removed before we start something. Earlier tonight, I was acting on an impulse. I hadn’t thought everything through.” Jami moves away, creating space between us.

I instantly feel the loss and lean against the island to help hold myself up. His eyes fill with undeniable pain, reminding me of something Melanie said once.

“Jami, what personal demons are you fighting that cause you so much angst?”

“What are you talking about?” His gaze shifts away as he dabs his thumb against his bleeding, split lip.

“I see it in your eyes. It spills from your pores. There’s something you’re not telling me. And I think it has to do with why you say you can’t give me what I deserve.” I raise my eyebrows in question.

One of his hands rests on his hip and he glances at the floor. “If Hunter can figure out how to make it so you won’t lose your job, he can give you the life you want. You deserve to explore that.”

“Here you go again, pushing me away.” I shake my head, frustrated. “You and I are the topic of discussion now. You don’t get to dictate everything that goes on between us. Be a man, Jamison, and either own how you feel about me or let me go because I won’t keep doing this with you.”

He releases a low growl. “I am telling you how I feel. I want us to be together without all the obstacles. And I won’t do this with you when you have feelings for someone else. How can you expect me to? I won’t share your heart, Dori. I want it all. Get clear on your feelings for him and when you do, we can talk then.”

I let his words sink in, refusing to look away. They make sense, but my heart feels like it’s rolling around in shards of broken glass. I wish my therapist could whisper in my ear and tell me how I should handle this.

Desperate for a resolution, I ask, “So that’s it? You’re asking me to walk away even if that means I decide to get back together with Hunter?”

Agony slices across Jami’s face as he swallows. “If that’s what it takes to get clear on what you want, then that’s what you should do.”

I study his face as my heart aches for the connection I know I’m losing. If only he would just come right out and say he doesn’t want me with Hunter, I would have the clarity I’m searching for.

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