Page 2 of Playing My Rivals

Why can’t Jami fight for me and work through the obstacles with me? It’s like he’s pushing me back to Hunter and it confuses the hell out of me.

“So that’s it, Jami. No matter what, you won’t step up and take the risk.”

He forces out a grief-filled laugh. “Why is this so hard for you? I’ve done this so many times before. It should come as no surprise.”

“What do you mean?”

“Every time you started dating someone new, I stepped away so you could explore a relationship with them. This isn’t some foreign concept with us. If anything, it’s the definition of all we’ve been in the past.” He turns away and ambles over to the window.

“I’m well aware. But it’s you who’s pushed me toward those relationships because you wouldn’t step up.”

He spins around. “No, Dori. We would get close. Inevitably, fate would put another man in your path and you would come to me for guidance. I was never the one who disconnected from you to explore a relationship with someone else. It was always you.”

With my fists balled, I take a step closer to him. “Even if that’s true, I only did it because you would pull away and go cold. Then you would be distant with me. If you wanted a relationship with me, why didn’t you fight for it? Why was it so easy for you to push me toward someone else?”

“Because I was chickenshit. I’ve made mistake after mistake and keep on doing it. You deserve more than me. Don’t you see that?”

Defeated, I shake my head. “And you still won’t fight for me.”

“Have you fought for me? Can’t you understand why I want to start something with you when your heart is free from all other men?” His confronting eyes cut deep into my soul and bear down on me. His question hits me square between the eyes.

“You’re right, Jami.”

“I don’t need to be right.” He turns away from me. “I need you to be happy.”

“And if that’s not with you, then what?”

“Then I’ll do what I always do.” With sad resolve, he stares out the window.

We stand in brittle silence for a few moments. I struggle to suck in a ragged breath as the crushing weight of heartbreak wraps around my chest and squeezes, charging the air between us. The pain steals my hope as hot tears blur my vision and leak down my cheeks.

A sob catches in the back of my throat and I nearly choke as I force it back down. "Now what?"

He faces me with his arms crossed over his chest and his eyes glossed over. "I don't know, Dori. That's up to you."

“You have two choices.” Mel throws her workout towel over her shoulder.

“What are those?”

“We can grab lunch at a restaurant and discuss what happened last night and why you cried through most of our spin class or you can come to my place. We’ll order in, have some wine and you can talk about it until you’re blue in the face.”

I pick up my bag and toss it over my shoulder. She pushes the locker room door open and we leave the gym.

“Let’s go to your place. I don’t want to sob in public.”

“I knew that was going to be your choice.”

She lets me cry the rest of the way to her apartment without asking questions as I try to make sense of my torn-apart heart.

We get inside and Mel opens her dining app on her phone to order lunch. “What do you want?”

I take my phone out of my bag and toss it on her coffee table. “Cheese pizza and garlic bread.”

Her eyes widen as she stares at me. “Wow. You realize you haven’t eaten pizza in over a year.”

“Has it been that long?”

“Yes, but if you’re up for it, I’m happy to throw away all the work we did in spin class.” She taps her finger against the screen of her phone. “Cheese pizza and garlic knots it is.”