Page 46 of Never Too Late

She brought me Dax.

He’s standing in front of me.

At the bottom of my garden.

Outside my house.

His hair, that’s longer now, falls over his eyes. He’s frozen in place, not bothering to move it away from his face. I don’t dare make any movement, worried he’ll flee again, like a skittish animal that’s easily scared. But I fight the urge not to get closer. When I see he hasn’t made a move to leave, I drop the towel I was clutching in my hand in a tight grip and place my phone in the back pocket of my jeans. I walk towards him as slowly as I can, which takes all my strength when all I want to do is run to him and hold him in my arms.

I almost feel lost in a trance looking at him. He looks exactly like he does in the photo in his shop. His ocean blue eyes look directly at me. The same blue eyes that have been haunting my mind ever since I walked out the door.

I’m lost for words, unable to speak, and I think he feels the same as me. Because right now, all either of us can do is look at each other. I don’t want to ever look away.

He’s still so fucking beautiful.

I knew he would be.

Unsure of what to think, or how to feel, I struggle to hold myself back from him. The need to run straight towards him and pull him into my arms is too intense. Too real.

“Pretty boy,” I say in disbelief. It’s probably not the first thing I should have said, but it’s all I could think of right now.

He doesn’t reply verbally, he doesn’t need to. Instead, he smiles. It isn’t a big smile, it’s fragile. Subtle. Everything I know deep down, Dax isn’t. Instead of questioning it, I take it in.

I will take anything I can get of him.

Even if it's miniscule.

It feels as though we’ve been looking into each other’s eyes for hours. It’s as though everything around us has stopped in time just for us; like it too can feel how cardinal this moment is. I don’t know who looked away first out of the two of us, but by the time our eyes are no longer lost in one another’s, Idah has disappeared.

There are a million things I want to say right now. I have an endless list of questions, but I’m afraid of saying a word. I don’t want him to run again.

Just when I’m about to speak, Dax’s voice floats between us.

“Do you have time to talk?” he asks sheepishly. Playing with the sleeves on his jumper, his eyes dart towards the ground nervously. He’s finding anything else to do right now apart from look at me. His hair continues to fall in his face as he lowers his head to glance at the ground, strands falling from his hair tie. The need I have to push it out of the way is too overwhelming. It’s obvious he feels uncomfortable right now, but I can’t help but soak in the image of him.

Hearing his voice is enough for me.

Him standing here is enough for me.

This is enough. No matter how much I crave to feel his warm skin against me again while we embrace or smell his unique scent of the sea with an undertone of caramel.

I've always loved the way his scent invades my senses.

“I have all the time in the world for you, Dax.” My mouth curves into a smile that I can feel has taken over my entire face.

Chapter twenty-six

Dax

“I don’t know how I’m supposed to come back home without you by my side. Sometimes I think about how life would be if I never returned, if I stayed in this war but then I remember your smile and beautiful sad eyes and I realise I can't stay away. Even if you told me to.”

I’m unsure of where to start, unsure of what to even say. When Idah first suggested I come with her to speak to Jae, I couldn’t help but stare. She couldn't have been serious. But I knew, as much as it pains me, I needed to see him. We are in the same town now, we’re bound to bump into each other one way or another, and as much as I want to stay hidden away forever, I can’t do it.

Even If he doesn’t want me anymore.

We met at the shop this morning, after we both decided to take a walk to Jae’s house. It still felt surreal knowing we were in the same place again. Part of me has wished this would happen for so long, but now I’m hit with the sudden reality that he has actually moved here, I’m not so sure my wishes were a wise choice.

After forty-five minutes of pacing the room back and forth while Idah sat patiently as I had an internal battle with myself, I eventually pulled myself together and agreed to go to his house with her. I made sure to tell Ty where I was going, with him being left in the shop alone. The two of them told me before we left that it was okay if it wasn’t the right time, we could do this another day.

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