Page 90 of Call Me Sir

My phone buzzes on the desk and I pick it up. I half expect it to be from my boss, the owner.

Cole: Maybe you shouldn’t come over tonight

Thirty

Sal

Every conversation I try to have with Cole leading up to Saturday falls flat. My body and mind are spiraling and curling in on themselves making it hard to breathe from the lack of physical touch. Sleeping has been rough without cuddling him.

How the fuck have i become so dependent on him after only the last few months. Month?

Rubbing my eyes, the lack of sleep is catching up.

Opting to walk to Shore Front Coffee Shop, it’s the same chain I went to with Cole but a little sleeker rather than the minty colored structure by the water.

On my way out of my office, I glance at Cole’s desk but he isn’t there.

His voice along with the others planning the gala burst from the conference room. Right, they’re planning the biggest opening gala for the season. This will set the tone for the rest of the season. Why does he sound so happy? Is that even his voice I’m hearing burst?

A few of the employees sitting at their desks working away, glance up at me with anxious smiles.

“How’s it going?” I ask, putting my hands in my pockets.

“Um, good.” One of them answers.

“Keep up the great work everyone.”

There’s a few smiles and I head out. Oh god, I don’t care if they like me, but will the respect they have for me now shift when they find out that i’m gay?

The insecurities start to creep in and I have to hum a little tune from my mom to calm me down.

The little coffee shop is calm now that it’s almost eleven in the morning. A friendly girl with purple hair takes my order. I recognize her but have to squint to read her name tag. It reads, “April.”

“I haven’t seen you here in a while,” she says. “Your usual?”

Cole’s teasing springs to mind. A hot cappuccino in the summer heat. “Make it iced,” I tell her.

“Oh, something new, huh?” Her kind brown eyes search mine in between glances between the machine and the cup she’s grabbing to write on.

“It’s been busy.” Normally the basics are necessary, however, chatting seems calming. “We’ve got lots we’re planning.”

“Oh yeah?”

She hands the cup to another barista.

“I can’t give away any details.” I think I will try something. “My boyfriend would freak out if I give out too much.”

I don’t know what the hell I’m even saying, however the excitement sparking in her eyes is magnificent.

“Well we don’t want to upset him, now do we?”

I shake my head, my throat constricting from… I’m not sure what.

“Your order will be down at the end.”

“Thanks,” I say, offering her a tight lipped smile.

That has to be the most we’ve spoken. Well the most I’ve said to her ever in the last year she’s been here.

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