Page 48 of Played

“Why did you come today?”

Another deep breath. “Well, despite your hopes showing, it was for Trudy. The proof is in my purse. I brought literally nothing, because I have no expectations for tonight. Trudy begged me to come and that’s the only reason, frankly, why I’m here.”

“Well, that’s fair enough.” I scoff a laugh. “I didn’t want to be here, either, if you want the truth.” I pause, smiling at her. “I don’t want to be twisted up in my family’s weird dimension, either, Freya. But I also didn’t want to leave things between you and I as they were. I meant it when I said that I’d been thinking a lot about what happened, and I think it’s important to work through it, so we can both move on.”

She scoffs.

“What?”

“Move on. Ethan, you have no idea. After what happened with us, I can’t be with another man.”

My face is serious. “Well, that’s a shame. Such a waste, Freya.”

Her gaze darts to mine. “And what about you, huh? You’re no better, Ethan.”

“I’m aware of that, lass. That’s why I wanted to talk to you.”

“So you could clear your conscience?” Her tone is sharp, almost angry.

“Aye, I guess. And so that you know the truth, Freya.”

Her gaze averts from mine. We’re silent for a beat. I can tell that she’s contemplating saying something, because her jaw muscles are working, so I wait, figuring that I’ve said enough. When she finally speaks, it tears my heart out. “Ethan, I don’t think that you ever truly loved me or that I ever truly loved you. Not unconditionally, anyway. Because it wouldn’t have mattered either way, if your da accepted me or if you accepted that I kept a secret from you. That’s what it boils down to, Ethan. What we had, might have been something, but it wasn’t love.”

Her words cut me deep. I feel a ball in my throat. I am not the emotional type, but that hurt. No matter how truthful she’s being, how raw and honest she’s being with me right now, that hurts. “I’m sorry you feel that way, Freya. But I loved you with all my heart.”

“That’s…really hard to believe, Ethan. Considering that you never once looked back. You never once checked in on me, or gave me a chance to explain, and it wasn’t until your family needed me, and when your da got the idea in his head that we should be together, that you came back to me. And now it’s too late. No matter how much I feel for you now, it’s too late. Too much pain and time has passed. And we can never have what we had then, ever again.”

I sit up, resting my elbows on my knees, clasping my hands together. “Freya, that’s not what I’m saying. We are two different people now. A year has passed since we had what we had. But what I am saying is that I did love you, no matter what form it was, I told you that I loved you, and I meant it. Sure, a lot has changed since then, and we can’t change the past, but it’s important for us to get through this, so that we can move on, no matter what that means for us, individually.”

She rises again. “Ethan, this is enough. I need to…I need to get away. Clear my head. I can’t…I can’t talk about this anymore.”

I rise with her and lift a hand. “Okay, it’s okay.”

“I have to go.” She says and walks out the door.

As she leaves, I think to myself, God…damn, she’s right.

…I need to get away, too.

Chapter 14

Freya

Trudy is dancing with Maverick when I storm out of the guest house. She catches me in the corner of her eye and makes a quick exchange with her crush, before scurrying after me. “I’m outta here.” I tell her.

“Okay, let’s go.” She says, surprising me. I figured she’d ditch me for a potential lay.

“I don’t want to get back on that plane.”

“No, we can’t, anyway. They’re not shuttling anyone until after supper.”

“We’ll rent a car.”

“And what are we going to do? Walk?”

“Aye. You got any better ideas?”

“Well, Freya. The airport is like an hour walk from here. Remember, we landed straight on the ranch.”

---