Page 168 of Unexpected Hero

I’m a mess.

But wait. Hold up. I’m not a virgin anymore.

He was inside me. Although I don’t think he enjoyed it much or got all the way in, I’m pretty sure it still counts.

“Stop that. Don’t finish that sentence. You’re perfect.” He kisses me, a gentle peck, then another. “I thought you might have this reaction again, but I got carried away and forgot to go slower. I should have checked in more.” He shakes his head, gnashing his jaw tight like he’s mad at himself.

Oh this sweet man.

A fresh wave of tears spills down my cheeks, dripping onto the pillow. “It’s not your fault. If you were going any slower, you’d be moving in reverse. And this isn’t like last time. I swear.”

He frowns, then pulls away. I grip him tighter, refusing to let him go. If he leaves me right now, I won’t be able to handle the sting of my failure. My aching vagina will have nothing on the pain from my rejected heart.

“I’m just getting you some tissues, sweetness. I’ll be right back.” He kisses me again, and when he pulls away, I release my death grip on him.

While he dashes across the room, I attempt to gather my composure. After three deep breaths, a shred of calmness returns.

And then it’s shattered.

“Lettie, umm… care to explain this?”

I bolt upright and am met with a dumbstruck James staring at me from across the room. He holds a box of tissues in one hand, and his other hand points at his condom-covered penis.

As much as I’d love to admire the view of his lean, toned body in all its glory, this isn’t the time.

Odd. I do not recall the condom being red before we put it on him. It was a lovely cream color.However, now, it’s decidedly streaked with red.

Oh boy. That’s my hymen blood.

Ah ha! I’m no longer a virgin — officially.Hurrah!

My mental celebration is cut short as I realize my secret is no longer my secret.

“Well?” he prods, compassion woven into his tone. His shock seems to have reduced from a level eighty to more like thirty-five.

I attempt a somewhat light-hearted yet factual response since he’s always Mr. Logical.“That appears to be... blood. And I would assume it is mine. Sorry about that.”

Using a tissue from the box, he removes the condom from his dick and tosses it in the wastebasket.

Stella told me that it was possible I’d bleed when I lost my virginity. And thinking back to high school, about half the girls said they bled their first time. Weird.

Shaking his head and mumbling, he approaches the bed and sits beside me. After removing two more tissues from the box, he dabs at my cheeks, wiping away the remnants of my tears.

Reaching up, I cup my palm over the back of his hand, holding it and the tissue to my cheek. My eyes telegraph an apology I’m too chickenshit to use my voice to convey.

The expression on his face is undecipherable. There’s virtually nothing left of the passionate man I saw earlier.

Shit, shit, shit. I really blew it this time.

More tears flow, but these aren’t from physical pain. They’re guilty tears, fueled by gut-wrenching regret. And fear that I may have lost him by concealing my virginity. Ironically, I was afraid telling him would send him packing.

He resumes wiping my face. When he speaks, his tone is kind but reserved. “Since my face was between your thighs for a good long time, I know you’re not on your period. So that only leaves one thing.”Lowering his chin, he wordlessly implores me to confirm what we both already know to be the truth.

I put my head down, shielding myself from his probing eyes and wrapping my arms around my midsection.

“Yes,” I answer in a shaky whisper.

I’m not sure why I clench my entire body while waiting for his response.

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