Page 15 of Unexpected Hero

My wall next to the bed has a picture on it. I colored it at school the other day.

That was when Daddy’s grown-up friend with the long black hair was taking care of me. I showed her my picture, and she hung it on the wall by my bed with tape. Now I can look at it when I listen to the clock as it puts me to sleep.

Sometimes, Daddy’s friend is nice to me like that.

Other times, she ignores me. Usually, when she comes over, she and Daddy smoke a lot of stinky things. Not just cigarettes. I cough when she’s here.

Daddy doesn’t like it when I cough because it’s too noisy. But I can’t help it. The smoke makes the air smell funny and tickles my throat.

A bad tickle. Not the good kind like Mommy used to give me.

No one tickles me anymore.

If I follow Daddy’s rules, he might like me better. Maybe then he will tickle or hug me.

When Daddy’s black-haired friend was watching me, she didn’t hug me or tickle me either.

She had a bruise on her face, and her lip looked like it had been bleeding. Daddy must have hit her for being too loud. That’s what he did to make my lip bleed.

The night before she started watching me, she and Daddy fought. A policeman came. I saw the red and blue lights flashing. But I hid in my closet like Daddy told me. I always do what he says.

After a while, I fell asleep in there. The next morning, Daddy wasn’t home, but his friend was. She said it was her fault Daddy was popped, so she would stay with me until he came back. I don’t know what it means to be popped. It sounds bad.

For a few days, she stayed with me. I thought it would be better than being in my room alone. But it wasn’t.

She had lots of people come here who I didn’t know. They were loud and smelly like her. And I think they were sick because they were poking each other with needles like at the doctor.

One time, Mommy took me to the doctor, and I got needles in my arm. She said they make it so I don’t get sick. I had to be brave when I got poked with the needles.

And I’m very brave.She was very proud of me.

I wish I still lived with her instead of Daddy.

He got back from being popped a few days ago, and he was very tired. I needed to be extra quiet then. When he got home, his black-haired friend left. But they yelled a lot first. I don’t think she’s coming back. But that’s okay. I won’t miss her like I miss Mommy. And at least Daddy won’t hit her for being loud anymore.

I’ve been in the same clothes since that day.

That’s enough of the memory game. I can’t think of more things anyway.

My whole body shivers. It’s very cold in here now.

When I get up to look out my window, the sun is getting ready for bed.

My arms hurt from squeezing myself too tight. I try to hug my chest to make me warm. Daddy says I should put on more clothes if I’m cold. But there are no clothes in my drawer. I checked.

I like it when he’s gone. But I also don’t like it.

Maybe I can look for a blanket in the other room.

And get a waffle.

I walk to my bedroom door, pretending to be a little mouse. Small and quiet so no one will see me or hear me.

Leaning my ear against the door, I listen for Daddy to make sure he’s still gone. If I go out there and he’s here, I’ll be in trouble.

He might take away my stuffed dog.

Maybe I should hide it under the bed to save him from Daddy.

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