Page 11 of The Love of Secrets

Oliver shakes his head no, refusing to take his medicine. It’s humbling how a sick two-year-old can make you feel so helpless. After a few tries, I’m thankfully able to get enough medicine in him, praying that this fever will be gone in the morning. He climbs into my lap and lays his head down on my chest. “I sleepy.”

“It’s okay, baby. Go to sleep,” I softly murmur, patting his back and humming Silent Night while we both keep our eyes on Daniel Tiger. After a few minutes, Oliver’s breathing starts to even out, helping me to relax. I keep my focus on the T.V., not wanting to move a muscle in fear that he will wake up. Soon my eyes feel heavy and they droop as sleep takes me under.

I peel my eyes open as I hear a faint knocking from somewhere in the apartment. I look down at the perfect sleeping boy in my arms and realize I must’ve fallen asleep. When I hear another knock, I sit up straighter. “Who could that be? Maybe Mrs. Scottensburg needs something?” I mutter the words quietly, only really talking to myself, not wanting to wake Oliver.

I slowly move Oliver from my chest to the couch. Standing up, I stretch, trying to loosen my muscles from sleeping in a sitting position. The knock comes again, but a little harder this time. I don’t say anything, just in case it’s someone I don’t want at my door. A small bit of fear grasps me, hoping that Michael hasn’t found me. Tiptoeing to the door, I hold my breath as I look out the peep hole. A gasp escapes when I see who is standing at my door.

Swinging the door open with more strength than needed, my guard immediately goes up as I try to block the entrance. “What are you doing here?” I ask in disbelief.

Mateo just shrugs his shoulders. “You weren’t at work.”

I bristle a little at his tone. “Why do you care?”

He raises one of his eyebrows and his mouth lifts in an upward position, as if to say you know why. We keep standing there in a silent battle when a small voice comes from behind me.

“Mama?”

“You have a kid?” He asks in an accusing manner. A tone I don’t quite understand since we don’t really know each other.

I move to block Oliver from his view as I bring my hands to my hips. “Yes, I have a kid. Why are you here, Mateo?”

Mateo steps into me, crowding my space. I instinctively take a step back as my whole body goes rigid. Every time Michael would come into my space, it meant nothing good. Mateo must see the fear creeping up in my eyes because he stops right where he’s at and tries to soften his body as much as possible.

I recognize that he’s attempting to diffuse the situation, but I’ve seen this before and I need to make sure I protect my son. I shoot daggers at him.

He clears his throat. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you. It was just surprised. You’re so young.” He shakes his head. “I just didn’t expect it.”

My hands clench at my sides as I roll out my neck. I remind myself that not everyone is an abusive asshole.

“Thank you for apologizing.” The words come out mumbled as they’re hard to say.

I don’t give him anymore though. He still hasn’t answered my question. “Why are you here?”

“I was worried. Are you sick? Is he sick?”

A pang of sadness hits me right in my heart. No one has ever asked about me or Oliver. Not the one who calls himself his father or even my parents. I try to think back to when I was a kid. I can’t recall a time anyone asked me how I was feeling. The only one whoever cared was my brother Bennett.

“He’s sick,” I whisper and my shoulders sag as I look down at the only man who has ever truly captured my heart. I pick him up as a tear escapes.

Oliver looks at me and then kisses my cheek. “It’s otay, Mama. No sad.”

Chapter nine

Mateo

Ifeel like an ass. I should’ve just asked Ricky for her number instead of showing up at her apartment unannounced. Somewhere in the back of my mind I know I could’ve just gone to the gym to get her information, just texted her to check in like a rational man. But I’m anything but rational when it comes to her. As soon as Ricky mentioned she had called in sick, I just started demanding her address.

But what I discovered was shocking. I thought when she answered I would find someone curled up watching T.V. I was not prepared to see an adorable sandy blonde little boy standing behind her dressed in truck covered pajamas. It never even crossed my mind, especially since she’s so young that she could me a mom. But if anything, it makes me even more attracted to her.

She tries to protect him from me, giving me her beautiful, sassy mouth. I step into her to let her know she needs to watch that sexy mouth, but instead I get her face laced with fear. A warm feeling fills me when I realize that she’s willing to protect him, even if she’s afraid.

I don’t want her to be afraid of me. That look of fear reminds me that someone’s hurt her and I know I will do everything in my power to never see that look on her face again.

She continues to stare at me and I force my body to be as soft and non-threatening as possible. I want her to know that she’s safe with me, that I would never hurt or her son. After staring at each other for what feels like forever, I finally make the first move.

Clearing my throat, I put my hands up in surrender. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you. It was just surprised. You’re so young.” I shake my head. “I just didn’t expect it.”

She doesn’t say anything at first, but I watch as she builds a wall of indifference right in front of me. “Thank you for apologizing.”

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