Page 60 of Return to You

After a few moments he prompted, “What?”

“You know I love you, right?”

He closed his eyes and inhaled through his nose, trying to contain the emotions that hearing those three little words inspired in him. He reminded himself that there were a lot of different kinds of love. She wasn’t necessarily saying that she was in love with him, but his heart still translated it as amazing.

“I know. I love you, too.”

They disconnected the call and he walked back in feeling like he was walking on cloud nine. Today had been such a roller coaster, but right now he was loving the ride. He’d just lowered down into the seat beside Nancy when he noticed a doctor walk out and talk briefly to the nurse who pointed their direction.

Kade nudged Nancy, and they stood to meet her.

“Mr. McNight?” she asked.

“Yes.”

“I’m Dr. Robinson. Are you George McNight’s son?” Her expression was unreadable.

“Yes.”

“Your father appears to have suffered a massive heart attack. When he arrived he was unresponsive and we were unable to find a pulse. The paramedics performed CPR and administered the defibrillator twice. We continued manual CPR, intubated him, and gave several drugs to try to restart everything in the body...however all our attempts failed. I am sorry but your father has passed away.”

Kade stood there, waiting to feel what he’d always imagined he would feel when this time came, but nothing happened. He wasn’t happy. He wasn’t relieved. He wasn’t anything.

“I’m so sorry for your loss. I can arrange for you to see him if you’d like to say goodbye.”

Kade wasn’t sure what to say. He didn’t know if he wanted to say goodbye.

“We’ll let you know,” Nancy responded for him.

“Okay. Let me know if you have any questions, and once again. I’m sorry for your loss.”

Kade watched as the doctor disappeared back through the door she’d come in and he sank back down in his chair. Nancy sat beside him.

“I’m not sure if this is the right time, but…” She reached down and rummaged through her bag. Then, she pulled out a VHS tape. “Your father recorded this right after he was diagnosed. When I became his sponsor, he asked if I would give it to you when he…was gone.”

“You’ve been carrying it around in your purse?” he asked as he took it from her.

“No.” She smiled. “It was at the trailer, I grabbed it just in case. He just told me where it was, he never actually gave it to me, I think because he didn’t trust me not to watch it. I wouldn’t even know how. I haven’t had a VCR in over a decade.”

Kade looked down at the white strip of tape that had his name scribbled on it in his dad’s handwriting. He wasn’t sure how he was going to watch it either, but surprisingly, he wanted to. He wanted to hear what his dad had to say to him.

And that was something he’d never thought would happen.

24

Ali rubbed her eyes and squinted as she held the railing and leaned forward to see into the darkened basement. She’d woken up, gone to check on Ricky, and then decided to come down and get a glass of water when she saw the light on in the basement. Since she’d just seen KJ and Ricky upstairs there was only one person it could be.

“Kade?”

“Yeah, it’s me.”

Ali quietly shut the door, clicking the lock behind her as she did. It wasn’t until she was halfway down the stairs that she realized she didn’t need to do that anymore. It was a habit she’d gotten into when she would come down here to cry in the middle of the night after KJ had caught her crying in her room and bathroom one too many times.

She stepped off the last step and saw Kade sitting on the couch in front of the TV. His dad’s face was on the screen but the picture was paused.

“Hey.” He looked up and she could see that his eyes were red. Her heart sank at the raw vulnerability she saw there.

“Hey.” She started to cross the room to him. “Is everything okay? Is your dad—”

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