Page 26 of Fragments of You

“You thought this would be so much easier than it is, didn’t you? That you would just come strolling back into town and I would jump into your arms like the last four years never existed.”

“Not exactly.”

“But you did think you could get me back.”

“P, what you and I share—”

“Shared,” I quickly correct.

“What we still share,” he continues. “It doesn’t come along every day. You can’t just replace me.”

“I never replaced you, Nash. I let you go and made room in my heart for a man deserving of my love.”

“You give him too much credit. Felix lied to both of us. He manipulated you. He wasn’t protecting either of us; he was protecting himself. He knew that if you knew the truth, he’d never be able to have you for himself. And he knew that if I had any indication that you two were getting close, I would have been on the first bus back to Madison.”

“And where would that have left us? It took you a year to call him. A freaking year to call your best friend. A lot happened in that year, Nash. Even if Felix had told you the truth when our friendship had started to become something more, and you had returned, I wouldn’t have taken you back. Not after the way you left. You broke my trust. You broke my heart. There’s no coming back from that.”

Every word tastes bitter on my tongue, the lies stinging the back of my throat like venom. Had he come back, I would have run into his arms and begged him to never leave again. I would have been willing to forgive and forget it all if it meant things could go back to the way they were. But I’m not going to give him the satisfaction of knowing that because then he’ll think there’s still a chance. And there isn’t. There can’t be. Not anymore.

“So you’re just going to ignore the fact that he lied and manipulated you?”

“I will talk to Felix. But it’s not really any of your business, is it?”

“Not my business!” Irritation peppers his words. “You are my girl, P. You always have been. I won’t let him have you.”

“Would you listen to yourself. I am not your girl. You threw me away, remember?” I push to a stand. “You don’t get to decide who can or cannot have me. I am not an object you own!”

“P!” Nash is on his feet in an instant, following me off the rock. “I’m sorry, okay. Please don’t leave.”

I whip around so fast, I damn near lose my footing.

“You asked me to hear you out, and I did. Thank you for telling me your truth. But it doesn’t change what you did. It doesn’t justify how badly you hurt me, not when you could’ve just told me that you were suffering. You were my entire world, Nash. Every pore in my body ached for you when you were gone.” Tears prick the backs of my eyes as my tightly held composure starts to slip. “I couldn’t eat. I couldn’t sleep. For weeks, all I did was cry. And then, one day, the tears stopped. And then, eventually, the pain became bearable. Little by little, I found my way again, and I won’t let you or your bruised ego take that away from me. Not again. I survived you once, Nash Ketter. I wouldn’t survive you a second time.” With that, I spin, leaving the woods the same way I entered.

Chapter Seven

Paisley

“THERE SHE IS.” FELIX smiles at me from the kitchen as I step through the front door, my mind still moving a million miles a minute, having not slowed down for a single second since I left Nash.

He didn’t try to follow me when I stormed off. A part of me was grateful because if he had, I don’t know what I would have done. The other part of me feels almost hurt that he didn’t. Though I shouldn’t be surprised that he didn’t fight for me. Seems to be a theme.

Do I want him to fight for me?

It’s a question I don’t have a chance to even entertain the answer to as Felix approaches, reaching for me the way he always does. Only this time, I don’t reach back.

He stops just shy of where I’m standing, concern furrowing his brow.

“Is everything okay?”

“We need to talk.” I step past him, dropping my things on the coffee table before plopping down on the couch. “I spoke to Nash,” I tell him bluntly as he takes the seat on the armchair caddy-corner from me.

“Okayyyy...” He draws the word out, his expression guarded, like he’s not sure what he should be preparing himself for.

“He wanted to clear the air about why he left.”

“So you know.” It’s not a question.

“That he’s been in and out of rehab for the last four years, and you knew about it. Yeah, I know.”