Page 68 of Love and Other Lost Things

“But we’re here for you,” Hannah continued. “Even Ali. She puts on a good show, but she still cares about you.”

Jane’s heart ached as she stared down into her mug of coffee. All those years ago, she’d been desperate to get out of here, terrified Dad would destroy her and the one person she’d cared about the most. But Dad had done exactly what she’d feared and stolen Nik’s scholarship anyway. Except it hadn’t destroyed him. Nik was still a doctor, maybe even a better one for how hard he’d had to fight for it.

It turned out that Dad had never had all the power after all. What if, a decade ago, she’d stayed and leaned on the people who loved her? Like Hannah and Ali. Like Nik. What if she stayed now, and leaned on the people who loved her?

Maybe it was time to stop running, to stop giving another abusive man more power over her life. She thought about Mom cooking and playing with Scarlett, so eager to be a part of her granddaughter’s life. And Hannah showing up here, after all this time, ready to give Jane a second chance.

And then she thought about Nik, crouching down next to Scarlett’s wheelchair to make her laugh. His eyes meeting hers across the crowded café. They’re going to love you.

What if she called Martin and asked for his help, and then opened up to Hannah, Ali, and Nik about her past in LA? What if, instead of spending her life running, looking over her shoulder, isolated and alone, she surrounded herself with people who cared for her and would protect her?

Jane looked up from her coffee and met her old friend’s eyes. “That means a lot, Hannah. You have no idea how much.”

TWENTY-FIVE

NINE MONTHS AGO

Jane glanced over her shoulder at the door to the apartment before she swiped to answer the FaceTime call. It was a busy night at the club and unlikely that Matteo would stop up here to say goodnight to Scarlett. But it was her ninth birthday, so he could surprise them.

“Hello?” she said, once she’d confirmed that there wasn’t any sign of him. Jane wasn’t hiding Mom’s call from Matteo, exactly. But he didn’t like Jane talking to her, and he’d roll his eyes and sigh until she finally hung up. It wasn’t like it was a regular occurrence. They talked maybe twice a year.

Jane held the phone up to Scarlett so Mom could see her.

“Happy birthday, Scarlett!” Mom said buoyantly, waving at the camera. In the background, Jane could see the living room wall with its old family photos, and a corner of brown fabric that was probably Dad’s recliner. Jane wished Mom would FaceTime from the kitchen so she wouldn’t have to look at it.

“Thanks, Grandma,” Scarlett said, shyly.

“How was your day?” Mom asked.

“Good,” Scarlett replied. She was always shy on these calls. Jane couldn’t blame her. In the past nine years, Scarlett had only seen Mom a handful of times, and only over FaceTime. Mom only called when Dad was away on his fishing trips since he had no idea they were in contact at all.

Jane couldn’t imagine what he’d do to Mom if he knew.

Mom chatted with Scarlett for a few minutes about her birthday—Jane was taking her to see the new Disney Princess movie tomorrow since Scarlett was just getting over a cold—and then Jane told her she could go watch TV in the bedroom.

“So,” Mom said, as Jane swung the camera away from Scarlett and in her own direction. “Scarlett is nine. I can’t believe it.”

Jane couldn’t either. Almost a decade had gone by since she’d left Linden Falls, since she’d moved in with Matteo and gotten pregnant and?—

Jane pressed a hand to the latest bruise on her cheek. Almost a decade since she’d been living with this. Sometimes she couldn’t believe she was still here. Somehow, she’d managed to keep putting one foot in front of the other. But she’d looked for a way out—so many times—and she was starting to despair of ever finding one.

Jane peered at Mom through the small phone screen. After that day she’d asked for money and Mom had turned her down, she’d never asked again. She’d never let Mom know that her life was anything other than fine. Jane could handle these once-in-a-blue-moon calls so Mom could see Scarlett. But she couldn’t handle Mom knowing she needed help and refusing to give it. So, Jane had never told her the truth.

But when she pulled her hand away from her cheek, she realized her mistake. Mom’s eyes widened, and she gasped. “Jane, what happened to you?”

Jane swore under her breath. She’d forgotten to hide the mark with make-up. They hadn’t gone anywhere today, so she hadn’t done her usual routine of cover-up, foundation, and powder. The ugly purple bruise was right there in the open.

“Um…” She searched for an excuse. “I ran into a cabinet.”

But Mom’s face screwed up suspiciously. That was the kind of excuse Jane remembered her using when Dad had left similar marks. “Did Matteo do that to you?”

“Mom, I have to go.”

“Jane.” Mom cut her off. “How long had this been going on?”

“It hasn’t. It was an accident. I have to go.”

“I thought he was such a good man. I had no idea…” Mom began, but Jane hung up before she could finish the sentence.

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