Page 67 of Love and Other Lost Things

There were no kids roaming their neighborhood in LA. Where would they have gone? The strip malls and night clubs? Scarlett’s school was huge, underfunded, and full of kids who had a lot more problems at home than Scarlett did. There were no slumber parties, no playdates in their neighborhood in LA, no after-school activities. It was easy to go unnoticed, and Scarlett and Jane mostly kept to themselves.

She smiled as Scarlett’s voice drifted out, its hint of older-child authority evident as she explained the rules. Amelia hung on every word.

Jane leaned into the room. “Just Uno, okay, Scarlett? No running around. You’re supposed to be resting.”

Scarlett nodded and went back to her game.

Hannah looked concerned as they walked down the hall to the kitchen. “Was she in the ER with Nik? Is she okay?”

“She fell yesterday, but she’s fine. She fractured her wrist and has a little bump on her head.”

“Oh, no. That’s so much for you to handle on a trip away from home.” Hannah glanced up the stairs to the floor above. “Is her dad here to help?”

“No, he’s back in LA.” Jane hesitated. “But my mom has been really helpful.” She said it partly to change the subject, but as the words came out of her mouth, she realized that leaving Mom behind again was getting harder to come to terms with. Mom, alone in this big house. And she and Scarlett miles away in Canada. It didn’t make any sense.

They entered the kitchen and found Mom setting the kitchen island with two plates of pancakes and two mugs of coffee. Hannah and Mom exchanged hugs and pleasantries, and then Mom headed for the doorway. “I’ll let you girls talk.”

“Thanks for this,” Jane said, nodding at the food and drinks Mom had made for them. “And for your help earlier today.”

Mom’s lips curved up in a smile that Jane couldn’t help but notice was a little wistful. “Anytime.” With a wave she exited the kitchen.

The sound of giggling drifted in from the next room. Scarlett and Amelia seemed to be having fun. Jane and Hannah exchanged a smile as they settled on their stools at the counter.

“Thanks for having us.” Hannah wrapped her hands around her mug. “I didn’t mean to intrude or anything.”

“You’re not intruding at all. I want to apologize for taking off the other day.” Jane knew she owed Hannah an explanation for her strange behavior in front of the Harp and Fiddle. And even more than that, for taking off a decade ago. If it had been Nik, Hannah, or Ali who’d disappeared without a trace, Jane would have been frantic. At the time, she’d been so wrapped up in her own desperation that she hadn’t realized what they must have gone through. But she had no idea where to even begin, especially with so much of her future still up in the air.

Luckily, Jane didn’t have to figure out what to say because the girls chose that moment to come into the kitchen and request hot chocolate.

“Sure,” Jane said, hopping off her stool and pulling open the fridge to get the milk. The girls ran back to their game and Jane quickly changed the subject to Hannah. “So, you’re a teacher now?”

Hannah nodded, her red curls bouncing. “I teach fourth grade at Linden Falls Elementary. And my husband is on the police force here in town.”

Jane’s head jerked up from where she was pouring milk into two mugs. “So, he worked for my dad?”

Hannah pulled her plate of pancakes closer and picked up her fork. “Not for very long. Ed was in the military for four years after college, and then he joined the police force about a year and a half ago.” She twisted the fork in her hands. “They weren’t… close or anything.”

Jane focused on stirring the hot chocolate mix into the milk, relieved she hadn’t revealed anything about leaving Matteo. Hannah’s husband might not have been close with her dad, but he was still a cop.

More giggles drifted in from down the hall and, for a moment, Jane wondered if she should tell Scarlett to take it easy so she wouldn’t end up with another raging headache, or worse, back in the ER. But when she stopped by the living room to deliver their hot chocolate, Jane couldn’t bring herself to tamp down Scarlett’s happiness. It was so rare for her to get to play with other kids.

Maybe when they found a place to live in Canada, Scarlett could finally have a normal childhood. She could have friends and sleepovers and there would be no tiptoeing around. And maybe they could even find a house with a space to play outside. But Jane’s mind couldn’t quite form a clear picture of it. Instead, her attention was drawn out the window to the yard in front of Mom’s house. It had snowed again last night, just an inch on top of the foot that had been there previously, and the drifts were fluffy and white, just waiting for a kid to run out and build a snowman.

“A couple of decades ago, who would have thought our daughters would be playing together?” Jane mused, once she returned to the kitchen and sat on a stool next to Hannah.

“I would have,” Hannah said, with a crooked smile. “Or I would have hoped it, anyway. You know I’ve always been a small-town girl, so my dream was that we’d all end up back here someday.” She shrugged. “I’m lucky that Ali’s mom is still in Linden Falls, and they’re close so she comes back to visit a lot. And, of course, I got Nik full time, which I never expected.”

“Was it awful when he lost the scholarship?”

Hannah pushed a bite of pancake around on her plate. “That whole time was hard for Nik. But I think it worked out in the end. He’s doing amazing, really important work at the hospital and in the community.” She shot a glance in Jane’s direction. “And I think he’s happy here. Linden Falls isn’t the backwoods town it was when we were kids. It’s come a long way.”

East Bumfuck.

When Matteo had first started calling it that, Jane had laughed. That was back when she still hoped LA was a place where her dreams could come true. She stared at the mug wrapped in her hands. The handle was chipped, the blue glaze faded, but still, it felt warm, comforting against her skin. This whole kitchen felt that way, with the heat coming from the oven where Mom had left the pancakes to warm, the smell of maple syrup mingling with Hannah’s familiar lavender perfume, the sound of the girls laughing over a game she used to play with Nik.

Her dreams were so much simpler now.

Almost as if she could read Jane’s thoughts, Hannah said, “I’m not sure why you left without a word all those years ago, but I know it must have been a good reason.” She looked at Jane with an intensity that left Jane wondering if there was more to her statement that Ed and Dad hadn’t been close. Did Ed know who Dad really was? Did Hannah?

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