Page 18 of Rocks You Like a Cabernet

Or is what I feel for Henrik a desire that will fade as soon as we enter the real world again. When we leave our bubble of happiness and isolation what will happen to us?

I’m a coward. I can’t make myself form the words and voice my questions. I don’t want to come off needy when only days ago I couldn’t wait to be out of his presence. Oh God, I’m a mess.

“Car should be down at the bend in about fifteen minutes. Let me know when you’re done here and I’ll help with your bags.”

I nod, speeding up my packing process because I’m nowhere near finished. The minutes fly by and the next thing I know, I’m standing at the open door, giving the cabin one long last look.

“Don’t worry Princess, we’ll be back.” I give him a sad nod, closing the door one final time. Henrik grabs my hand, surprising me with the gesture, but I hold on tight. The trek down to the car is an easy walk this time since there’s no rain pelting us.

Henrik has piled our bags together at the end of the path and I can see the driver placing them in the trunk as we make our way to him. Thanking Henrik for opening my door, I slide into the cool interior of the car and settle in for the long drive back to Vancouver.

When Henrik’s beside me again, all the questions that have been circling in my head finally spill out. I can’t take the not knowing.

“Henrik,” I begin, but stop when he takes my hand and gives it a lingering kiss. My heart beats faster in my chest.

“There’s paparazzi on the edge of the forest path.” It takes me a moment to understand what he’s saying. When it finally hits me, I feel like I’ve been sucker punched in the gut.

He’s faking his affection. And here I was thinking it was real.

Wow, the student out acts the teacher. He’s good, really good.

Forcing a smile on my face, I give him a nod and continue pretending that my heart isn’t cracking in my chest.

I guess I got my answer though. We’re still faking it till we make it to premiere night.

Too bad that my feelings for Henrik are all too real now.

Chapter Ten

Henrik

Ifeel like a fucking onion. I’m acting on so many levels, so many layers right now that I’m becoming mentally exhausted. I’m so tired of pretending that I could scream.

I was so over faking it with Bryn. I wanted the real damn thing.

I wanted our kisses over a candle lit dinner to be real. I wanted the way she smiled at me when we were at the cabin, sparkling smiles, to hit me everywhere we went. Instead I get these half-laughs when we’re not behind closed doors.

She’s holding parts of her back from me again and I fucking hate it. I know we need to have a conversation, but there never seems to be a good time. People are always rushing us from one location to another.

Production is in full swing and the first episode of the series premieres tomorrow. It’s all anyone on set can talk about. That and the final scene we’re doing today.

And it’s the scene. The part of the book that had fans going wild and is the most loved part of the entire series. Because this is the moment that Adelina and Eren give in to their desires and stop fighting what’s between them.

When I read this chapter, I didn’t think it would wow me. I’d been offered the role of Eren before I read the series so I knew what happens and how this moment pushes the story forward. What I hadn’t expected was to be so moved by the moment.

The way the author details Eren’s feelings for Adelina. The struggle he battles everyday, knowing that the Princess isn’t meant to be his but she has his heart–gutting.

Talk about art mimicking life. I knew exactly what Eren was going through because I felt the same way about Bryn. I hadn’t just fallen for her–I’d plummeted. I was so deep into my feelings for her that there was no way out…and I didn’t really want to fight them.

All I needed to do was tell her how I felt.

“Henrik. You’re on set in five minutes,” someone calls out.

Doing the last button up on my shirt, I turn to look at myself in the bright mirror. It’s a strange sensation, looking at yourself but not seeing the person you’re used to seeing. I know the man in the mirror is me, but also not me.

The one trait I share with Eren today is that we are both men in love, but not able to capture that love.

“Henrik!”

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