Page 17 of Condemned Soul

“You got that wrong.” I shake my head.

“Have I? So you don’t have a daughter and an old lady, whatever that is? You know, it all makes sense now. You never want me to go to the club, I had to beg you to take me there Saturday night.”

“You got that wrong too. Yeah, I got a daughter, and yeah, I let Mary-Ann call herself my old lady, but it’s just a status. I don’t feel anythin’ for her. Not like I feel for you,” I admit, holding my nerve and letting the words come out. I ain’t ever felt the way I do about a woman the way I feel for the one standing in front of me, and suddenly I realize that I ain’t ashamed to let her know it.

“Oh, I’m sorry, I’ll just get back to being your side piece and we can go on as normal.” She laughs sarcastically as she returns to her window and lifts it open. “See yourself out, Prez.”

“You're not listenin’ to me.” I grab her bratty, little face in my hands and force her to look me in the eye.

“Mary-Ann got herself pregnant to ensure I’d never leave her because she knows what kind of a man I am.”

“And what kind of man is that, Jimmer? Because I don’t feel like I know you at all.”

“The kinda man who takes care of what's his.” I stare into her wild, fiery eyes. “You’re mine and I wanna take care of you too.”

“You can’t have us both. I can’t have you be with me and then go home to her. I have feelings too, Jimmer.” She shakes her head and lets the sadness overtake her anger again.

“I don’t go home to her. I’ve provided a home for her and Hayley, away from the club, because that's how she wanted it. She’s the mother of my child and despite what I may think of her, I gotta give her that respect. But I don’t wanna lose you. I won’t fuckin’ lose you,” I growl.

“Why? You can have any woman you want. You're handsome, and despite all the crime and killing you do, you're a real nice guy.” She smirks, despite the fact we’re going at one another.

“Which proves that you know me,” I point out.

“It doesn’t answer my question or solve the problem. I get that you have to respect the mother of your child, I admire it because it shows what kind of man you are. But if she’s your old lady, who am I?”

I wish I could make her see. I wish she could feel the pressure I feel just for a few seconds so she’d understand.

“You're the woman…” I ignore the childish bedroom surrounding us because I know she doesn’t belong in it. “…who got the leader of a motorcycle club standin’ outside your fuckin’ window throwin’ stones to get your attention.” I put it into perspective for her.

“You're the woman who makes me feel like I wanna go the extra mile. And you, Joanne Sanderson, are the person who’s gonna turn my life around. I’m always gonna be a criminal, I don’t know any other way, but I will be a better man for you,” I promise, hoping that it’s enough.

Her lips twitch into a smile that gives me hope and when she grabs the front of my cut and drags me onto her lips, the kiss she gives me tells me everything is gonna be okay.

“I want to be yours,” she tells me, pushing me back onto the mattress that’s behind me.

“What about your folks?” I whisper, admiring how she’s suddenly become that woman I’ve been falling in love with again.

“You’ll just have to make sure I’m quiet.” She raises her eyebrows as she slides the nightdress she’s wearing up over her body and tosses it onto the floor.

“You're a very bad girl.”

“And you're bad for me.” She frees me from my jeans and takes me in her hand, guiding me toward that tight hole that I’ve molded to be my perfect fit. I watch as she closes her eyes and moans as she takes all of me inside her, and I immediately slam my hand over her mouth and bunch the other in her hair when she starts to ride me.

“I’ve fuckin’ missed you, Jo,” I whisper, admiring how beautiful she looks as she takes what she needs from my cock. “I won’t let you leave me again, ya hear?”

She nods her head, letting the pleasure take over her body, and I have to tighten the hand I’ve got muffling her cries.

“There ain’t no one else. Never fuckin’ will be,” I promise her.

I feel just as pathetic as the man throwing stones at her window when I realize I’ve stuck to that fuckin’ promise. There has never been another Joanne. I never allowed there to be. I always wondered how something that was so pure and fuckin’ beautiful could have been so destroying. How such a delicate creature brought a man like me to his knees. That’s why I had to make a promise to myself too. A promise to never let it happen again.

I step into the clubhouse where I’ve arranged to meet Ella and the kids, and suddenly feel a firm hand take my elbow and drag me into the corner of the room.

“The men have been dealt with,” Jimmer growls at me.

“When you say dealt with…”

“I mean they won’t be troublin’ ya again.” The look he gives me tells me that’s all I need to know, and all I’m ever going to.

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