Page 81 of Ruining Vanessa

Suddenly, my eyes start to prickle. Even with his tongue invading my mouth, something about how he’s kissing me is different from the other times. His hand isn’t rough. He isn’t trying to humiliate me. It’s gentle, sweet.

Romantic.

I want this story to be true, so badly.

He pulls away, panting against my lips. “I shouldn’t,” he says, suddenly. “I’m still married. What kind of man cheats on his wife?”

I wasn’t expecting this. But if he’s playing the role of someone who cares about a waitress, it makes sense that he’d care about cheating.

I’m quiet for a long time, because really, I don’t like the type of men who cheat on their wives. My sister had been adamantly against it, too, which was one of the many reasons she’d loathed Emilio so much. It shakes the fantasy for me a little even though I’m the one who’d set it. I should’ve cast him as a lonely bachelor instead. “But you’re separated,” I say out of the blue. It doesn’t necessarily make sense, but does anything about this really need to? It’s just some sort of game, and for once, I’m setting the rules. “And she’s already cheated on you.”

“Of course,” Giulio answers smoothly. “Now she’s trying to take all my money in the divorce. I won’t let her get in the way of this—of us.” He kisses along my jaw. “You’re so much better for me than she ever was. You’re not a gold digger. You’re just a pure, gentle person.”

I let my hands slide down to the bottom hem of his shirt and tug, urging him to let me pull it over his head. He indulges me, and I look at him through the lens of a young waitress who’s being swept off her feet by the man of her dreams. If only he was that, because he really is so handsome…

Getting off his lap, I take his hand and pull him down with me as I lie down on my back on the mattress. “I just want you. I don’t care about material things.” And that’s true, even, which makes it easier for the words to roll off my tongue.

Giulio gives me a smoldering look before unbuttoning his jeans and stripping the rest of the way. He’s half-hard now, and it’s strange how his cock isn’t intimidating me the way it would have several months ago. I can feel my face redden as I stare at him.

I’m used to all of this.

I want him.

I don’t, I try to tell myself, but if I have to pretend for him anyway… I open my arms for him, and he settles in next to me on the mattress, kissing me again.

“You’re the best thing that happened to me,” Giulio says between kisses. “Gives me hope that I’ll survive this divorce.”

“You can survive anything,” I say, and that feels a bit too honest. “And if you want, I’ll be there for you every step of the way. I know I’m young, but I’m completely, utterly devoted to you.” I take his hand and put it on the top hem of my underwear, urging him to remove them. He obliges, and I lift my ass to make it easier.

Is this what he wants from me? Usually he’d be hard by now, if he was hurting me or just using me. It doesn’t take much for him to get aroused when he stops by just to fuck me.

“Utterly devoted,” Giulio repeats, snorting. “That’s a nice line.”

I blush, but I don’t comment. I thought it might be what he wanted to hear.

He tosses the panties aside and shifts to kneel between my legs. “What do you like, sweet girl? I want to make sure I treat you right.”

“I want…” I’m still utterly humiliated at the way my body wants him so badly, and I don’t know what to ask for. What’ll keep his attention? “I want you to be gentle with me, like you always are. I want to come around you while you come in me.”

Where are those words coming from?

Giulio suddenly closes his eyes and breathes deeply. “Fuck.”

Did I say the wrong thing? I tense up, afraid that I screwed it up and he’s going to go back to playing the monster, being the monster.

But when he opens his eyes again, Giulio smiles at me so gently, I almost don’t recognize him. Then he leans down to kiss my stomach, his hands pushing my thighs up. “I’ll show you a real good time, sweetheart.”

“You always do,” I say, the words more truthful than I care to admit. I hesitate then slowly unbutton my shirt the rest of the way, letting it fall completely open.

He takes a moment to look me over, and I tense a little. I’m afraid he’ll leer at me, or make some fucked-up comment, but instead, he just kisses a little lower on my stomach. It takes me a moment to realize what he’s about to do, and… oh.

I’m not sure I’m prepared for this.

Giulio always jokes about needing something to keep his mouth occupied, but so far all I’ve seen him do is suck off Slayer once, and not even for very long. Damien has done this for me occasionally, and even Slayer did it once. Never Giulio though.

Somehow, I don’t expect Giulio to actually be good at this. Part of me has still been wondering if he isn’t maybe more gay than bi, but with how enthusiastically he’s putting his tongue to use now, my doubts flee.

He’s had a lot of practice.

---