Page 59 of Bound By Words

She’d been where I was once, a novice desperate to learn more, so listening to her first book on the subject might give me some insight into how things worked, at least with fictional characters. I knew it wasn’t real, but I thought it might help.

My eyes dragged over the shelves, my fingers brushing familiar items and placing them in my basket as I listened intently to the story of Michael and Kayla.

Kayla was brave, not backing down from the intimidating executive who had pinned her down with a menacing stare as she entered his home for the first time. I wished I had her kind of courage. I hadn’t finished the checklist yet because I had no idea exactly what I wanted. There was so much information and so many things I didn’t know.

Fantasizing about something and doing them were two entirely different things, and while my imagination was a dirty bitch, I was afraid real-life Kelly was just a big bore.

Would Nathan be disappointed if I wasn’t as adventurous as I tried to appear?

What if he wanted to try something I didn’t?

I knew he said he’d respect my boundaries, but I had no idea what they were. What if I asked him to try something, and I hated it?

This was too much pressure.

I listened intently as the story played out, continuing to work my way up and down the aisles. Michael was an intimidating hero, alpha to the core, with very set methods, and he didn’t leave much room for humor in his interactions with Kayla. I couldn’t picture Nathan in that kind of role. He had some alpha tendencies, but he was warm, kind, funny, and playful. I found myself wishing I could see more of his Dominant side. I had a feeling he could be just as authoritative as Michael if he wanted to, but I had a hard time reconciling the scenes in my ears with what I’d seen of his behavior.

As I rounded a corner, a hand closed on my shoulder, causing me to jump, my heart beating out of my chest.

“I thought you were going to be longer.” My voice was strained as I willed myself to calm down. I had nothing to be ashamed about. I was a grown woman. I could discreetly listen to smut in public if I wanted to.

“Well, last time I checked, it was long enough, but if it’s not doing it for you…” He trailed off with a smirk.

“Oh, shut up.”

His eyes momentarily flashed with heat, but he smiled, reaching up to rub his knuckle across my cheek.

Nathan was the last person I’d expect to judge me, but I was still embarrassed I’d been caught unaware because I was so engrossed in listening to the spicy things that had come out of my sister-in-law’s imagination. I had absolutely no idea how Evan swung marrying such a badass.

“Why are your cheeks all pink?” Nathan frowned. “You aren’t feeling sick, are you?”

Nope. Just horny as fuck. But I wasn’t about to tell him that. Especially not in the middle of a tiny grocery store in a town where everyone literally knew every other person. I didn’t live here, but Chase and Evan did, so I didn’t want it getting back to them that Evan’s sister was a thirsty ho.

“I’m fine. Just fine. Absolutely fine,” I rambled, earning an amused smirk from Nathan. It shouldn’t be news to him that I was a giant dork. “You don’t need to worry about me. How are you? Did you get the wood you needed? I mean, get the lumber order moved up?”

His smile widened as he crossed his arms over his chest, the soft blue plaid stretching enticingly over his biceps.

“My wood is just fine. It should arrive on time,” he laughed. “Did you get everything you need here?”

“Yup. Got it all.” I nodded, shoving my phone in my pocket along with my loose AirPods.

“You ready to head back to the house? I want to set up some things to take advantage of a dry day tomorrow to get more of that brush cleared and get some framing done.”

I nodded, my heart was finally calm after he’d startled me. Thank God he hadn’t asked what I’d been listening to. I was a terrible liar, and he knew it. In the short time we’d spent together, he was already picking up on my tells.

“Lead the way.”

He started toward the cash register, motioning for me to put the basket on the counter once we reached the front.

“Find everything you need today?” the cashier asked as she looked between us with a gentle smile.

“Yup,” I nodded. Already calculating the amount of time it’d take us to get back to the house to continue the audiobook where I left off. I’d just gotten to the good part and felt a little desperate for some relief.

Knowing Nathan would be occupied the rest of the afternoon would make it easy for me to sneak off and listen while I was pretending to get work done. I did need to do actual work, but I could multitask, right? I was sure plenty of people listened to straight-up smut while at work. There was nothing to be ashamed about.

“I got this,” Nathan whispered as he reached toward his back pocket.

“Absolutely not.” I shook my head. Half the stuff in the basket was just for me. I wasn’t making him pay for my snacks, even if he could afford them.

---