Page 99 of Rebel

Even if we had hurt her sister, how could she do that to another person?

If she could, then she’s not the woman I fell in love with.

Chase is right. It’s all a lie.

I don’t know why I came back here, other than it was where we were happy, where I first trusted someone else.

My feet dangle in the empty pool. The party is in full swing upstairs, filled with celebrities and A-listers, yet I sit here, alone once more, knowing no one else will be able to touch me.

It was only ever Beck, and I can never trust her enough to get close to me again.

I will spend my entire life alone, haunted by the warmth of her lips on mine and the feeling of being loved.

I don’t bother wiping the tears away.

I let it hurt.

I cry for the lost boy inside me, the one who finally found someone to save him and keep him safe, only to be hurt again.

I cry for everything I’ve lost and everything we could have been.

FORTY-FIVE

Sick of feeling sorry for myself, I force myself out of bed, splash cold water on my face, and grab one of Chase’s hoodies I’d stolen, then I check my phone.

They haven’t called or texted, and my heart aches.

Flipping through the apps, I pick the one Kolton installed that lets me see where they are. It seemed useful, since they have the attention spans of kids and get lost easily, and I’m grateful for it now. I see Chase is the closest, so I grab my keys and head out to find him.

I need to fix this or I’ll live with regret for the rest of my life.

It doesn’t take me long to get to the bar in a taxi. After hopping out, I head inside, unsure what I’ll find, but whatever it is, I deserve it.

I search the crowded space filled with the scent of sweat and alcohol. Crinkling my nose, I search for Chase’s familiar face in the crowd, and when I find him, my heart breaks a little more.

He’s in a booth, his eyes glazed and wide, with lipstick marks over his face and neck. Giggling women surround him, and bottles are spread out across the table before him. I feel sick, and part of me breaks, screaming at me to turn and leave, but I won’t.

That’s what he wants.

He wants to hurt me the way I hurt him.

He wants to punish himself, and I won’t let him.

Forcing my chin up, I head his way. He meets my gaze as I stop at his booth, then he arches his eyebrow and grabs the nearest woman, tossing her on his lap like a shield. He’s doing it to hurt me, but all I see is his sadness, not the cold, angry exterior he’s trying to project, and I won’t embarrass him in front of all these people.

I know how quickly rumors spread, but watching them cling to him is pissing me off, especially when her red nails drag down his chest. I ignore my need to rip her off him, since she’s not doing anything wrong. She doesn’t know he belongs to me.

“Leave,” I demand, raising my voice.

Some of them glance at me, while some of them are smart and get the hint, scattering at whatever they see in my face, but the one on his lap doesn’t.

“You have three seconds,” I warn her. “Move, now.”

She blinks, glancing at me. “Or what?” she snaps. “He chose me.”

Rolling my eyes, I grab her jacket and toss it at her. “He’s too drunk to even sit up properly, and you’re not drunk at all. That’s fucked up. Go away now.” She glances at him, sees what I mean, and gets up.

“Shame,” she mutters. “I bet he’s a good fuck, or so I’ve heard.”

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