Page 154 of Vows In Corruption

I will hold Bennett tight and never let go, fighting all of his nightmares along the way.

EPILOGUE

Bennett

Iwalk over to the gravesite and place a bouquet of flowers right in the middle.

Twenty-five years.

That’s how long it’s been since my parents died. That’s how long it’s been since I’ve stood only feet away and watched as their casket got lowered into the ground. That’s how long it’s been since the last time I’ve visited.

Even though I haven’t been here since the day of the funeral, the plot is cleaned up and has been kept up and I’m sure that is thanks to Henry.

I don’t know what spurred the decision to come here today, but for some reason it felt necessary. Like it was something that I needed give the importance of the day.

“I don’t know if I’m supposed to talk out loud or keep all the words in my head.” I say to the headstone in front of me. I’m not usually one to talk things out out loud, that’s an Ella thing, but keeping things in seems like it would be a lot more emotionally damaging that talking to a piece of stone with my parents names on it.

So talking out lout it is.

“I’m sorry that I haven’t come as often I probably should. I guess I got so used feeling you two around the house that I didn’t feel the need to come here. But now thinking about it, I can see how that would be wrong.”

God, I’m fucking babbling. Why is this so damn hard?

“Anyway. I wanted to come today, because I guess I wanted to feel close to you guys. I’m getting married today. Well, I’m getting married again. The first wedding was just so that I could be come CEO, but this time it’s the real thing. It’s going to be to the same woman, but we thought it would be nice to start anew. I even gave her your ring mom. She loved it. I don’t think she has taken it off since I gave it to her. Same goes for the bracelet Henry gave her. I think if you were both here, you would have loved her. She started out and my assistant but she turned into so much more. I never thought that I would find someone like her, but I did and I couldn’t be happier. It’s like she completes me both in my personal like and in my work life. I don’t know if I’d be able to be CEO without her. She is absolutely everything.”

Why is this so damn hard? Is this what other sons do when they go visit their dead parents? They just ramble about a bunch of nonsense?

“And you would have loved your grandkids too. It’s crazy to think how big they gotten from when I first met them. It was like one minute they were cute kids running around with no care in the world and then the next they became teenagers with attitudes.”

I wonder what my brother would say if he saw just how much the kids have grown.

“They remind me so much of Robert and me when we were younger. Especially the boys. They each have their own personalities but there are times where I swear I’m looking into a mirror or watching a home movie because they are just like us. It’s crazy. Samantha reminds me of you, mom. There’s a fire in her that I hope never gets put out. That girl is going to be coming after me CEO title I’m freaking sure of it. And she is as beautiful as you. There is this picture of you in the study and I swear there are times I look over at it and I see Sam. It’s uncanny.”

A lump starts to form in my throat, but I push it down as best I can. I cried at this gravesite before and I don’t want to do it again.

“I’m been trying my best in raising them. At least I think I have. I haven’t had a door slammed in my face in a few months so I see that as I good sign. But they are good kids, and I’m trying to be the parent that you two taught me to be. Hopefully I’m making you proud.”

Something wet lands against my cheek and for a second I think that I has started raining, which would be ironic, but when I wipe the droplet away, I realize it’s a tear that has escaped.

I guess crying while I’m here is inevitable.

“As for Robert, I’m still looking for him. I won’t stop until I find him. He’s out there, I know he is. I just have to continue looking. I will find him though and I will bring him home. I promise you that.”

More tears start to roll down my face, but this time I don’t move to wipe them away.

“I miss you guys. There are days where I truly wish that you were here. That you could see this family that I have and be happy here with me, but that can’t happen and I’m okay with that. I am okay. I promise you that I am. I’m happy and I’m okay.”

I don’t know if those last five words are for them or for myself.

For another ten minutes, I stand there just looking at the grave, letting all the emotions that I’m feeling take over. I say anything else until I’m ready to head back to the manor.

“I should get going. I don’t know if I can promise that I will be back more often, but I will try. I love you both. Thank you for being the best parents in the world and I will continue trying to make you proud.”

I needed this. I needed to come here today and talk to them. To let everything out. I needed to feel my parents close by today and I did. I feel stronger for it.

The majority of my life has been defined by me losing my parents at eight years old. And while that is a part of me, it’s not who I am.

I’m not just the kid that was orphaned and was raised by his caretaker.

---