Page 3 of Princess Avenged

My mind turns to mush. My throat closes. My heart stops. My legs crumple.

“No!” The word shreds its way up from inside me. My body turns inside out, leaving my organs exposed and raw.

“Where’s Blade?” Crusher asks, but his words barely register.

“Still in the archives,” Flame answers. “Find Selina, Ana’s sister. She’ll help you find Blade. I’ll stay with Ana.”

Flame’s words float around in a world turned to mush. My exposed heart has been dropped in acid; my vision is hazy, like a thick film is covering my eyes; my ears and head are stuffed full of damp wool; and my heart can’t be beating, because my blood is ice cold—and yet I detect the hard thump of a heart.

No longer supporting myself, I’m in Flame’s arms, and it’s his heartbeat I hear, not my own.

Flame carries me back to the apartment, heading toward the bedroom, but I can’t possibly sleep. Or perhaps I am asleep?

Yes. I’ll wake from this nightmare, and my world will be set right, because there is no world in which I can survive without Phil.

“Ana, you should try to get some sleep.” Flame’s fuzzy voice seeps through the sodden wool that’s stuffing my ears and my mind.

My skin is numb. I barely register Flame’s touch on my face as he tries to soothe me. This can’t be true. It can’t. Blinking, I fight to bring Flame’s face into focus, and when I succeed, his obvious pain amplifies my own, and solidifies the truth of what’s happened.

I love Phil, but so does Flame. I want to erase his pain too.

Shifting away from Flame, I slam my fists against my thighs. Physical pain might wake me from this nightmare. The pain barely registers. I’m living in dual states, simultaneously numb and in pain—intense pain.

I want to feel pain. I need it.

“Stop that,” Flame grabs my forearms.

My silk robe is open, revealing deep red bruising on my thighs and my belly.

Flame’s hold on me tightens. “Ana, you’re hurting yourself.”

I struggle against him, loving the brutal tightness of his hands on my arms, and the ache of my muscles battling against his superior strength.

“Ana,” Flame says, his voice tight. “Stop fighting me. I’m going to break your arms.”

“Good.”

He shakes his head. “Darling, you don’t mean that.”

My arms go limp as Flame’s term of endearment brings me back to the moment. “Is it true?” I whisper, then look up into his eyes. “Tell me I’m dreaming. Please, Flame. Wake me up.”

His eyes flood with even more anguish, and I look away.

“It can’t be true.” I back away from Flame, turning to pace out of the bedroom and across the sitting room and back. I left Phil less than two days ago. My entire world can’t have flipped in such a short time.

I continue to pace, but Flame pulls me into his arms as I pass. “What can I do for you?” he asks. “How can I make this better?”

Leaning back, I look up into his eyes. “Tell me it’s a lie. Or a joke. Or that I’m dreaming.”

Flame slowly shakes his head, revealing more pain than seems possible for such a carefree man.

“Crusher would joke about this.” Flame looks like he’s trying to convince himself. And that fuels my hope. My world is tumbling out of control, throwing me about in its strong churning forces.

“You don’t believe it either.”

“I don’t want to, but Crusher wouldn’t lie. Not about this.”

Pushing against his chest, I shake my head.

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