Page 79 of The Sound Of Us

Pepper and I step aside to let them pass. Peter slaps my ass before I can move out of his reach.

“Bust that pussy goood, Frank,” he slurs. I cringe when Frank just laughs it off.

“Well, what’re you standing out there in the rain for? Get inside,” Frank says.

Pepper and I get inside. The place is a disaster. Dishes strewn across the kitchen sink and empty beer cans overflowing in the trashcan. I mentally kick myself for not emptying it out earlier. If I had, it wouldn’t be overflowing now.

The living room has more empty beer cans and someone hadn’t finished their pork chops. Pepper sprints for it and today I let her clean the plate. She hides the bone from Frank on her way to the bedroom. “On my side,” I murmur when she passes me.

Then when I notice Frank heading for bed too, I pull her back. “Whoa, wait. Stay with me.” She listens, settling under the coffee table to protect her bone.

I work quickly, starting in the living room, only stopping to take two Tylenol. Then I work my way through to the kitchen. Every single thought about the increased frequency of my headaches is incinerated before it fully forms. Not tonight. I’m not going to be a cancer-ridden cunt tonight. The test results are not yet in, so just for tonight I’ll be the in-remission guy.

Just for tonight, I’ll refuse to believe that God would be so cruel and let the cancer come back. Not now. Not when I’ve found Eli. Before, it didn’t mean much to think about dying. Beside Ben, who promised to always keep my memory alive, there hadn’t been really anything else to live for. Until now. Until Eli.

Thirty minutes later, I’m done cleaning. I consider showering before going to bed, but the thought of washing Eli off my skin makes me physically ill. I wash my hands and softly call for Pepper.

She doesn’t answer, so I go to get her from the living room.

Oh fuck. Pepper, you little shit.

I switch off the lights and hurry to the bedroom. Sure enough, she’s on the bed. On Frank’s side. With her damn bone. And as if on cue, Frank draws his leg up and boots Pepper off the bed.

Flying onto the floor with a yelp, she comes to me quickly. I guide her to my side, making sure her bone is hidden behind the curtain, or she’ll get another booting from Frank for scraping the bone the entire night.

And as I drop off into sleep, I make dreams in my head about Eli, thinking about the key he gave me. Yet another piece of evidence of my affair. I slip the key into my pillowcase, another hiding place for the various things I keep from Frank.

Not even the increased tension in my head can sour my thoughts or remove the smile from my face. A smile that belongs only to Eli.

Chapter 44

Eli

My mother rubs her chest repeatedly and rolls her shoulders back every now and then on our video call.

“Are you okay?” I sign.

“Yes, just a bit of discomfort. I’m not young anymore, Eli,” she signs back with a smile.

I don’t like it. “You should have that checked out.”

“I will. How was your grand opening yesterday? I wish I could have been there.”

Yesterday had been great for the town’s people. The house is now a historical landmark as far as the residents are concerned. Mrs. Dalton will take up her manager’s position as soon as I return to the city. My father’s childhood home will now be open for anyone passing through to enjoy. He’d be happy. I think I’ve made him proud.

“You’re not well. I wouldn’t have wanted you to make the trip, anyway. I’m a little worried about you.”

She smiles. “I’m fine, Eli darling. I love you for worrying, but try not to.”

“Okay, I’ll see you soon. Take care of yourself.”

“You too. I’ll see you soon.”

After the call, I lose myself in thoughts about Axel and what I need to do. I hate the weekends when I can’t text him. I could just text him on his own phone, but that’s exactly the reason I don’t have his regular number—so I’m not tempted by such reckless thoughts.

I touch my hand to my chest where Axel left his sorrow a few nights ago. I don’t know if there’s ever been a day when he was truly happy. I have every resource at my disposal to give him everything he could possibly want or need and I would love him for all of eternity until he forgets his every sadness. We just need to get past this fucking marriage issue.

So, I place a second video call to my lawyer. I give him hypothetical scenarios and he gives me answers without asking me if I’ve lost my mind. But he does highlight the fact that I can’t simply make arrangements for someone’s divorce the way I’m suggesting. Of course I know that, but I need everything out on the table. I need to cover all bases before I go to Axel. I need to be able to answer every question he might have for me.

---