Page 85 of Textbook Romance

‘You know, I like your brother very much, too.’

‘I’m glad.’

‘I’ll do the right thing by him, please don’t worry.’

And there’s a moment where we both look out into the car park to see Jack playing around with his nephews, holding one under his arm and trying to chase the other. We both laugh to see it and share a final look, one of love that we both feel for this man. I wasn’t sure what to do with that love, but I think I now know.

Jack

I walk up the path to Zoe’s house, looking down at the gift in my hands. I don’t know if this is a particularly good idea – the sentiment is there but I hope she gets it. It’s just that there really was only so much chicken that I could bring into this woman’s house without it feeling like it was starting to get weird. I’ve only been here once before, post Laser Tag, but there’s a familiarity there now. Half a hand job in the kitchen and then a night in her bedroom, her body curled into mine on her bed. It’s one of those moments I return to a lot when I’m waiting for traffic lights to turn, when I’m looking out of windows and stirring dinners. To hell, all those small moments are taken up by thinking of her.

I put my finger to the bell, watching her shadow in the glass come towards me.

‘Hey,’ she says as she sees me, exhaling deeply. She’s not in all her football gear. It’s that cool casual look I’ve come to know from her; a floral dress with her trademark big earrings, bare feet and her curls hanging over her shoulders. She leans against the door as I stand on the doorstep, taking her in.

‘Is the coast clear?’ I say quietly.

She nods. ‘The kids are at their mates’ houses for the afternoon so yeah… please…’ she says, widening the door. ‘Please come in.’

I step over the threshold and naturally gravitate towards her, feeling some relief that I can do so without anyone looking or judging.

‘Good afternoon, Mrs Swift.’ She lets me back her against the wall next to her front door, and allows me to kiss her gently, to let our bodies fold into each other. ‘Well, I’m glad I have you for a couple of hours at least. I was very glad to get your phone call,’ I whisper into her ear. She curls a leg up around mine, and the sensation makes me drop what was in my hands on the floor.

She giggles. ‘You’ve dropped your package,’ she tells me.

‘On the contrary.’

She glances down at the box on the floor, the shape of that velveteen box and I see her pause for a moment. Oh. Really? You think that. OK, then. I smile cheekily and she looks me in the eyes, not knowing what to think.

‘If I got down on my knees now, would that totally freak you out?’ I joke. She bites her lip and I’m not quite sure if she gets the joke. I bend down on one knee, kissing her stomach, one hand at her waist and I reach for the box, opening it up. ‘Zoe, would you give me the greatest honour of wearing these paperclip earrings?’

She looks down at the little silver studs and laughs, but there’s another emotion there. I think it may be relief and I am not quite sure how I feel about that. Is that funny? Or such a bad thing?

‘They are very cute. Of course, thank you.’

I get up, putting the box on a shelf nearby and then returning to her face, tucking a curl behind her ear. ‘Did you really think I’d got you something else that could fit in a box like that?’

She shakes her head. ‘No… oh god, no. It’s just the romance of my hallway, you know?’ She takes a hand and leads me through to the living room where she’s lit a fire and laid out a bottle of wine and crisps. She grips on to my fingers and squeezes them tightly, encouraging me to sit down.

‘So… this morning…’ I tell her as she fills up my wine glass.

‘You met Brian.’

‘The Brian.’ We clink glasses and take a sip of our wine.

‘I’m sorry about that. We were both watching Dylan, we were all leaving to get a McDonald’s. It kind of took me by surprise.’

‘Don’t apologise,’ I tell her. I can sense she’s a little uneasy. I’m not sure if that’s because she thought I was going to propose two minutes ago and was freaked out by the prospect or it’s because we’re on different pages altogether. There’s been something sitting between us since Winchester that I can’t quite put my finger on. She seems a bit more confused about us, like she may be holding something back. ‘Can I ask a question, though?’

‘Shoot,’ she says, leaning into me.

I place a hand on her thigh, slightly nervous about what I want to say next. ‘Not that it was the right time this morning, but do you think there might be a day when you introduce me to your kids and Brian as someone more than just Jack?’ I say, looking her straight in the eye.

She leans over the table to put a pretzel in her mouth, her stance changing from someone who was once relaxed to someone who’s desperately searching for an answer. ‘I think I’m just trying to define what this is… boyfriend sounds so…’

‘Don’t say the word,’ I tell her, putting a finger up into the air.

‘I wasn’t going to say young. It just doesn’t feel… right.’

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