Page 9 of The Other Woman

“Because Doug is out of the picture, and I’m in the right head space this time.”

Why did that, coupled with the look in his eyes, make my knees weak and a sweet kernel of warmth unfurl in my tummy and take a slow ride down between my thighs?

“And you’re gonna want to stop looking at me like that right about now.”

“How am I looking at you?” Was that my voice sounding breathy and hoarse?”

“Like you want me to do exactly what I’m imagining doing to you. Not yet, though. Let’s start with this for now. Then I’ll show you how to really blow off steam.”

RACHEL

He had my head so turned around I almost forgot why we were there. I missed the whole thing between him and the staff, and then I was led into the room that looked like a hodgepodge of madness. The walls were cement gray, and there were dishes, vases, and all manner of breakable stuff laid out strategically around the room.

I was given a hard hat and one of those things mechanics wear over their clothes that was covered in paint for some odd reason. Then, there were the hammers that were lined up against the wall. About four or five different sizes.

I was encouraged to heft each one and choose the one I was most comfortable with. I still didn’t know what was going on until they told me that I was free to break anything in the room. Then I remembered that Jacob had called it the rage room, and it clicked.

Rage? I’m not sure I ever felt that. Numb, scared, alone, disillusioned, and totally betrayed. But I’m not sure I ever felt rage on this level, nothing that would warrant this in any case.

I walked around the room, looking at the dishes and reading the bottom while carrying the hammer. By the time I’d made my way around the room, that word kept playing through my head, and I started swinging for no reason at all.

I didn’t make a sound. Not the first few minutes, in any case. But then I started grunting, then yelling, then screaming, all the while swinging. I don’t know how long I was in there, but I do know that I went back over broken stuff a time or two when there was nothing else to destroy.

I didn’t stop exactly; it was more like my arms gave out on me and burned like hell. And then I realized that I’d been crying the whole time. I started to drop to the floor, but there were arms there to hold me before I reached bottom.

I smelled his cologne before I felt his chest under my cheek. He took us both down to the floor and sat with me on his lap, just bawling my heart out. He didn’t speak, didn’t try to shush me. He just held me and rocked me the way I do the kids when they’re upset.

I cried myself out, and by the time he helped me up, a few hours had gone by. “How long was I in there?” I asked as soon as he helped me into the car and walked around.

“A couple of hours. Don’t worry, I told Helen we’d be late getting back.”

I think I passed out on the ride home, but when I woke up, I felt somehow better. The kids had been up for a while, and I apologized to Helen, who brushed me off and gave me a nod after a good once-over.

“How’d she do, Jacob?”

“She’s a champ. She did two sessions back-to-back without realizing it.”

“Wait, Helen, you knew?”

“Yes, Jacob asked me if I thought it was a good idea.”

This was all so confusing but not surprising. Everyone had rallied around me and the kids in a way I never expected. One of the things Wendy had said in one of her texts was that I needed to back off because I was no longer Doug’s wife and it was no longer my place to engage with his family and friends.

It was one of my biggest fears, having everyone ripped away from not only my kids but me as well. It’s been great not having to face that nightmare. “Alright, you two, the kids had their early dinner, and I’m going home to see about my husband.”

She kissed both our cheeks and headed out the door after saying bye to the kids, who were busy eating the dinner she’d made them. “I don’t know how to thank you. I feel…”

“You don’t have to thank me, and you don’t have to say anything. I know you’re uncomfortable, so I’m going to head out. Your gym equipment should be here sometime tomorrow, so I’ll come by sometime in the afternoon to set it up and then get out of your hair.”

“Jacob, stop. I don’t want things to be uncomfortable between us. Don’t change anything about the way you’ve been acting so far.”

“Okay, if you’re sure. But if you get uncomfortable at any point, let me know. It’s enough that you know where I stand, and it’s okay if you never get there. I’ll always be here.”

He was halfway to the door when a thought struck me. “Jacob, Doug used to tell me how much you traveled before he and I met. Right after we got married, you stopped traveling as much, and now that I think about it, you’ve only dated one person seriously in that time, and it wasn’t for very long.”

“What are you asking?”

“Was that…”

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