Page 108 of Electric Touch

“You make my head hurt.”

“What else are little sisters for?” She pokes out her tongue. She used to do it all the time when she was little. “Go, call him, make the arrangements. I’ll expect you at two and bring your game plan, sis. We’ve got some revenge to plan.”

“Okay, one, I can’t make it tomorrow, so unless you want Nash to head up here alone. Stop grinning, that isn’t happening. Two, his tour is coming up soon, he’s busy. And three, that is not how I am going to tell him about his ex’s shitty behaviour.”

“So next weekend, then?”

It isn’t as simple as she is saying. If Nash comes up here, he will find out the truth about what is going on. And I don’t mean with Riley. I’m not sure I’m ready for that.

Ariella reaches over and takes my hand. “Come on, say yes. At least ask him,” she makes a pleading face at me.

I agree, because I’m always going to give my baby sister whatever she wants. No matter how hard.

“Okay, I’ll invite him, if he can make it.”

“Good. You finished that?” she nods at my coffee.

I’m not a fan of cold coffee, so I nod. Ariella starts to get up but sits back down. She inhales. “Damn leg went to sleep,” she laughs and rubs her calf. “Pins and needles, Tia, pins and needles!” She yelps, half laughing. I drag her out of her seat, linking arms, and we walk back to her apartment. She recounts all the cool shit she is going to tell Nash about me.

One thing she says before she slips into her room for a nap, gives me a strange feeling.

“Who knows, Tia? Maybe you’ll do one more off the list. Fall in love.”

I can’t stop thinking about that as I get into Apollo’s car. It is an item on the list. I didn’t think it was achievable. Not in the timeframe I’m working with. If it is going to happen, then it can’t start with me lying to him. I spend the entire journey thinking about Nash, trying to organise my thoughts.

Whenever I think of him, a smile graces my lips and I get this ache in my chest. Whenever anything happens, I have this need to tell him. I don’t want to be his crutch getting over his ex. Which is perhaps what makes me hold back the most. I don’t want to get hurt.

He assures me that isn’t the case, that things with Riley are done. Problem is, I know she isn’t. Whether or not she admits it. Whether or not she is in a new relationship. No normal person would do the things she is doing if they didn’t care. And what if he picks her? What if he sees the things she is doing as evidence of her still loving him?

Everything within me rejects that. Nash isn’t a liar. He’s made his feelings on Riley clear to her and me. The insecurity remains. Last night, I was so intent on staking my claim and making her back the hell off. Now, I’m nervous. What if he doesn’t pick me?

I missed him when he wasn’t here last week. Yes, I keep myself busy, and when I’m lost in my work, time flies. At night, I wished he was in New York so I could go see him. I still have my friends to go out with and talk to, but something about being with Nash is different.

Surely it is too soon to be in love? I’m not my mother. I don’t fall in and out of love at the drop of a hat. I have, in fact, only ever been in love with one other person. As much as it hurt when it ended, I got over it. I rarely think of him. I don’t know where he is or what he is doing. He could be married with five kids for all I know.

I enjoy being with Nash. I enjoy talking with him. Looking at him is fast becoming one of my favourite pastimes. Which is insane because I have more important things to do with my time than stare at his perfect face. Who am I kidding? I could stare at him for hours on end. I’ve never needed a person before. I’m happy in my own company. Nash means a lot to me.

Being together means a lot to me.

Is this love? Is it wrong that I want it to be?

My two best friends will have very different opinions about this. Sasha wants me to go full throttle and be a rockstars girlfriend. Apollo isn’t convinced Nash is ready to be with anyone else. He doesn’t fully trust him not to hurt me. I can see it from both sides.

The only side that matters is mine. Well, and Nash’s.

But I have a secret that could change everything. We need to talk. I need to tell him what is going on and then… Maybe he won’t want anything to do with me.

It’s a chance I have to take. I know that now.

When I got home, I texted Nash to ask to meet me at the John Lennon memorial in Central Park in the morning. He agreed and said he’d bring coffee and pretzels.

Now I stand here, staring down at the memorial. The mosaic isn’t much in the grand scheme of things. The memorial comprises much more than this small circle, with the word ‘Imagine’ at the centre. It’s the five acres surrounding it. The garden of peace which Lennon’s widow designed. People from all over the world contributed to it.

I notice Nash walking towards me, carrying a coffee tray and a small white bag. He has a beany on his head and is wearing a military-looking jacket with a black scarf. I smile as he stops and kisses my cheek, looking down at the mosaic too.

“Did you know this is one of eight designated quiet zones in the park?” I ask. My lack of greeting doesn’t faze him.

“No,” he shakes his head. “What does that mean?”

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