‘Nothing,’ he finally rumbled, turning back to the window. ‘It doesn’t matter.’
Cooper sat silently next to her for the rest of the journey. She sat there, shell-shocked till they stopped outside a fancy hotel. Kate recognised the place. She had been here before for conferences with work. They had a pretty impressive ballroom too. It would have been a nice place to visit with Cooper, but she knew the night was ruined now. She sat clutching her bag, staring intently at the back of the seat in front. She felt numb; she wanted to run but she didn’t trust her legs not to betray her. The driver got out, grabbing the chair from the back. He opened the passenger side, putting the chair in position. Kate went to move, but Cooper’s open hand covered hers, stopping her. He reached for his wallet, and pulling off a note, he talked to the driver in hushed tones. The driver shrugged good-naturedly and walked off towards the smoking hut, lighting up on his way to some service staff puffing away in the shelter.
‘Are we going back?’ she asked quietly, not trusting herself to look at him. He couldn’t even get out of the damn car.
‘What?’ his reply came, softer than before. ‘No, Kate, I would still like to go out, if you like. We’re here now.’ He sounded dejected.
Kate nodded, keeping her eyes focused forward. ‘Okay. But I don’t want to talk about Neil, okay? I’ve tried to get him to come and see Jamie. He speaks to him, but he won’t talk to me, okay. He blames me for the crash I think, as much as he blames himself. Our marriage was over long ago, before Iraq. Before all this.’
She felt Cooper relax at the side of her, and she allowed herself to breathe a little. She was kind of glad he knew. It was nice to speak the words out loud.
She felt his gaze on her and flushed. He was looking at her, but she didn’t want to see that look in his eyes again, so she didn’t chance it. Her heart couldn’t take it.
‘So now you’re with Trevor?’ he asked, his voice sounding as unsteady as she felt inside.
‘Trevor?’ she said, baffled. ‘No, of course not!’ She laughed a little, the random thought amusing her.
‘I saw you today.’
What? She thought back to the movement she’d seen when she’d hugged Trevor. Realisation dawned, and her head snapped to face him. ‘The hug? Oh no.’ Incredulous laughter tittered out of her at the thought. ‘I was just thanking him. He’s like a big brother to me, and I’ve been a bit of a mess with everything going on. Why didn’t you just ask me?’
‘What would I say?’ he asked, his words soft. ‘Nothing to do with me, is it?’ he added. ‘You’re a free woman. I thought that there might have been something between you, that’s all. I misread it.’ He swallowed. Hard. ‘I was jealous, actually.’
‘Of Trevor?’
‘I didn’t like his arms around you. I’m sorry for acting like an asshole. I don’t… talk about stuff like this. I never needed to talk about stuff like this, till I met you. You force me to think things I never have before. Feel things.’ His jaw clenched.
‘Well, you called it wrong, Captain,’ she squeezed his hand. ‘My marriage was over a long time ago, and Trevor’s like family. We’ve worked together forever.’ Her lips quirked. ‘You were jealous.’
‘Yep,’ he huffed. ‘I know I’ve no right to be, but I feel like I know you.’
She was about to answer him when he brought his hands up to her face slowly, stroking her cheeks with the backs of his hands. His touch did something to her, fired her up and soothed something in her at the same time.
‘I keep wondering to myself,’ he said breathily. ‘If I tried to kiss you, would you let me?’ His fingers moved to her neck, her collarbone. Each stroke was delicious, and she felt it everywhere.
Her breath was coming out in little gasps now, and she felt embarrassed about how turned on she was. A minute ago, she wanted to slap him, and now…
‘Sir, is everything okay?’ The driver was standing there, looking uncomfortable. They looked at each other, Cooper taking one last look at her lips before pulling away, releasing her.
‘We’re fine, and great timing, seriously.’
The driver chuckled. Cooper positioned himself in his chair, and held out his hand.
‘Shall we?’ he enquired. Kate noticed that he looked visibly rattled, and she knew that she felt the same. It gave her a thrill to know that she undid him, too. She put her hand in his, and the smile he flashed her felt like a lightning bolt through her body. She blushed, smiling back, and they started to head inside.
Having survived most of dinner with small talk about the food, the room, and the other guests, they were just waiting for dessert when Kate felt his eyes watching her across the table. The dining room was opulent to say the least, all chandeliers, white linen tablecloths and hushed music coming from the piano being played in the corner. Cooper had booked a table near the terrace, and the huge patio doors opened out in front of them, bringing with it a hint of honeysuckle from the foliage outside. The breeze occasionally brushed up her arms, and she could feel them tingling from the touch, as though Cooper himself were touching her with his gaze. The heat from their earlier exchange was still there, a little awkward. Like they’d slipped past what they were into something else. A thing that neither of them could identify. He was jealous, thinking Trevor was more to her. Hadn’t baulked at her Neil confession. He took all of her baggage in his stride, and she wondered what it would take to truly rattle a man like this. She picked up her wine glass and took a long sip, looking over at him. He was still watching her, a look of pure intensity. Swallowing hard, she felt her face flush and inwardly cringed at her body’s reaction to him.
‘What’s wrong?’ he asked, his lips curling into a devilish smile. ‘Feeling a little hot?’ She grinned back at him and cracked up laughing. He laughed with her, and the tension around the table seemed to pop. He wiped his hand down his stubble, neatly trimmed now, and grinned at her.
‘I’m sorry,’ he said simply. ‘It’s been a weird day, I know.’
She tipped her head in agreement, and they both ignored the waiter as he put down their desserts. The waiter smirked at them both and returned to his station. ‘Third date, sweaty sex later,’ he said out of the corner of his mouth to his waitress friend.
She looked over at the couple. ‘Yep, that’s rip-my-clothes-off-right-now tension right there.’
Back at the table, Kate took another large gulp of her wine. She felt it relax her, tingle her hard edges a little. ‘It has been, very strange, and a big step forward for both of us, I think.’
Cooper drank from his glass, swirling the contents around in a slow circle. ‘How long were you and Neil together?’